Cold Hearted Snake
by D3athz-C4lling
Summary: When Matthew notices that Arthur, his landlord who keeps raising the rent like nobody's business, has the hots for his older brother, a devious idea comes to mind: hook Arthur up. The only problem is that Alfred is not so willing to be an "escort"… AU.
1. The Contract

**A/N: **"He's a cold hearted snake, look into his eyes. Uh oh, he's been tellin' lies. He's a lover boy at play, oh ho, c-c-c-cold hearted s-s-snake" -shot- Yeah I'm lame...the plot for this fic is actually kind of based on a true story! My relative is in a similar situation and I pray the best for her...but at the same time I couldn't pass the chance to write a fic on it OTL. So sorry to those who thought or were expecting the sequel to my other fic...I'm working on it I swear!

I want to say right now that **smart!**Alfred and **lovesickfool!**Arthur will be in this fic, and so they will behave accordingly. But hopefully I was able to retain some of their orginal personalities.

**Full Summary: **When Matthew notices that Arthur, his landlord who keeps raising the rent like nobody's business and was about to kick him out, has the hots for his older brother, Alfred, a devious idea comes to mind: get the two to date so that the landlord will lower his rent. The only problem is that Alfred is not so willing to be an "escort", and in return for his service, wants Matthew to do something for him.

**Warnings:** Alfred is **smart**, sly, and conniving is this fic (this is a warning on its own), swearing, OOCness...obviously, AU, and human names used.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Hetalia nor the song Cold Hearted by Paula Abdul

And no, this isn't a song fic, I'm only borrowing the title.

* * *

Matthew really needed a hero right about now.

"Honestly, Matthew, didn't I remind you beforehand that your rent was due today?" Arthur Kirkland, Matthew's new landlord chided.

"I…I know Mr. Kirkland, but I just don't have the money to pay it all right now. Can't I pay a portion of it at a time? I promise I'll find another job so that the rest won't turn into debt…"

The poor (in both sense of the word) blond wished he had the old landlord back…at least he cut the boy some slack. He knew that Matthew only worked as a photographer for a magazine company nobody really reads. But because he moved back to France, the Brit came in and didn't even bat an eyelid at Matthew's sad story. Hell, he made it even worse by increasing the rent every month, explaining that he was only "cleaning up the mess the previous landlord made" and that it was for "renovation purposes". Seriously, everything about Matthew's humble apartment was fine! Other than the occasional breaking of the air conditioner or stove, these quirks were what made the place charming…occasionally. But Mr. Kirkland did not share the same sentiments. Upon his arrival, he inspected every apartment and made any "necessary" changes, taxing it on the poor tenants' rent.

"I'm afraid you can't do that, Matthew." Arthur pinched the bridge of his nose, clearly exasperated from the other blond's attempt to skip the rent this month. "Either you pay your rent, or I will have no choice but to kick you out."

_What a stiff… _

"…I guess I-"

"Mattie! There you are! How long has it been since I last saw you?" Alfred barged right past the Englishman standing at the doorframe to bear hug his younger brother.

"About two years eh," Matthew answered while letting his brother swing him around like a rag doll. But based on the smile he had on him, it was clear that the younger was just as happy with the reunion.

"Wow, where have the times gone?" the new blond beamed, ruffling Matthew's hair.

Normally, no matter who it was, Arthur would lash out at the person being rude. But not this time. He remained quiet and watched the two brothers converse.

"Well, now that I found you, lemme get my luggage from the taxi waiting downstairs,"

"…You forgot my apartment number didn't you?"

"What? No, of course not!" Alfred saluted before brushing past Arthur, still lingering near the doorway.

Once the blond's footsteps receded down the hall, the landlord asked "Who…who was that?" his voice softer than it was before.

"Oh, that was my older brother," Matthew deadpanned, gloom once again hanging over him when he realized that he still hadn't given the evil landlord his money yet.

"Ah…I see," the man sounded a bit dazed, staring in the direction Alfred left.

"Yeah…"

_Hey wait a minute, is something wrong with him?_

Arthur's eyebrows were no longer furrowed, his mouth slightly agape…and was he blushing? Or maybe he had a kink for makeup…Matthew will just take the first guess.

Just then a light bulb went off in his head, and a devious smile spread across his lips. In an ever-so polite tone Matthew offered "Would you like to meet him?"

"I beg your pardon?" the landlord snapped out of his trancelike state.

"If you are willing, I can have you speak with him; I really would like for you to get acquainted with my family,"

"Y-yes…that would be delightful," something like glee shone in the Englishman's eyes. "Does he mind if we went to a tea parlor?"

"He loves tea, I'm sure he won't mind at all. Would tomorrow in the afternoon be alright? He is quite exhausted from having to fly over here,"

"Wonderful, then if you'll excuse me, I'll get ready." The landlord turned around, completely forgetting the reason why he knocked on the blond tenant's door in the first place.

As Arthur walked away from his apartment, again in that dazed state, Matthew quietly closed the front door.

_Looks like I dodged another bullet_

X.X.X.X

"So Alfred, what do you think of the new manager?" Matthew tried his best to ease into the topic as much as possible.

"You have a new one? Since when?" Alfred was hogging the whole sofa, stuffing his face with a hamburger he got for dinner.

The younger blond tried keeping up the smile he had on. "Yes, you passed by him just this afternoon."

"Really? Never noticed," he shrugged and was about to reach for the remote when a hand stopped him midway.

"Wouldn't you like to meet him?"

"Nah…he's probably a stiff," Alfred brushed off the offer.

"How can you say that when you never even met the guy?" Although Matthew had to admit, Alfred got it right on the money with that one.

"Uh, because most business people or managers are like that?" Alfred continued to munch on his dinner. "Besides, why the hell do I want to meet up with your landlord? To sweet-talk him into something?" He had no idea how right he was.

"Oh my god Alfred, you read my mind!" Matthew exclaimed enthusiastically. "So does that mean you'll go out with him for tea tomorrow? Specifically during the afternoon?"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa…what? Go out? You lost me there Matt,"

"Please Al, you need to go out with him. Just this once," Matthew was now clinging onto the sleeve of Alfred's t-shirt.

"Go out? As on a date?" There was a dumbfounded look on his face.

"It's the only way I can stay in this apartment,"

"What are you talking about? How is going out with your landlord related to you staying here?" By now, Alfred placed the half-eaten burger down on the table in front of him and made room for Matthew to sit next to him on the sofa.

The younger brother sighed before revealing his master plan. "My new landlord, Arthur, likes you." He looked into Alfred's blue eyes to make sure he was still with him.

"How do you know?"

"I just do. Now back to the explanation…I…don't have enough money to pay the rent…" Matthew said bashfully. "The reason why he was even at my door was to collect the money, and he's going to kick me out soon if I don't pay up,"

Alfred was tapping his chin with his index finger, putting the pieces together.

"So when I figured out that he liked you, maybe if you go out with him and persuade him to lower the rent, I get to keep this apartment."

"I'm no whore Mattie…" Alfred pouted.

"No you're not. You're an escort."

"That's not the point! I mean, can't you just go out with him? We look almost the same,"

"Then how do you explain why he only blushed when you were around and was yelling at me for his money when he was only with me?"

"You're right, not everyone can pull off my looks," Alfred added smugly, running his hand through his short blond hair for emphasis.

"Right. You're so charming," Matthew complimented sarcastically. "But seriously, please Alfred, it's the only way…"

It was Alfred's turn to sigh before answering. "Look Mattie, I may not be the smartest person around, but I have a good moral compass. I don't think I should be playing with his heart like that…I mean, what happens if he's serious?"

"…Do you have something against homosexuals?"

"No, it's not like that," Alfred glanced away from inquisitive violet eyes. "But it's not like I ever dated one either."

"Then this is a new experience for you," Matthew tried sounding optimistic.

"You're missing the point, it's not right to use him like that to keep this apartment. What's in it for me anyway?"

Matthew didn't know what to say.

"I thought so, and besides, in case you're forgetting, I'm only visiting in between semesters; I have to go back to Harvard sooner or later and then this whole thing will fall apart. Plus, I want to see my friends again, not spend my time with a stranger." The only way the blond got into such a prestigious school was through scholarship money; if he was that rich, Alfred would have been helping his brother pay the bills.

"You'll get to see Kiku and Toris again, but just have a drink with Arthur tomorrow before you do. Please Alfred," Matthew began begging. "You're the hero aren't you? Heroes don't let their own siblings rot in the streets,"

"But it's your fault you can't pay the rent…"

"I was able to before! But because he keeps raising it, I can't keep up…" Matthew bowed his head in defeat.

An iron curtain fell on them before the older spoke up. "…How old is your landlord?"

"Eh? I think around maybe 24…"

"Good lord, Mattie!" Alfred sighed dramatically, placing the back of his hand on his forehead. "Not only do I have to date your landlord, but an _old_ landlord?"

"Save that acting for when you're on the date, drama queen. He's only a couple of years older than you, if you haven't figured it out yet." Matthew crossed his arms in front of his chest defensively.

"Yeah…but he's _your old_ landlord," Alfred couldn't help but snicker. "How messed up is that?"

"So are you going to help me out or not? Because if not then I'm going to have to find an apartment catalogue and move out,"

Alfred's expression turned serious for a moment, but then it was replaced with a smirk. "Okay, I'll help my dear younger brother out. I am a hero after all…but in return for my splendid service, you'll have to let me stay here while I'm in town and do whatever I tell you to."

"What?"

"Hey, hotels and room service don't come cheap ya know." Alfred retorted. "I think it'd be smarter if I just stayed here!" he explained while propping his feet up on the table next to the hamburger.

"Okay…but when you go out with Arthur tomorrow, make sure to pretend that you're interested in him and persuade him to lower my rent! Or both of us won't be staying here for long…"

"You got it," Alfred gave him a thumbs-up.

"It's a deal then."

* * *

**Endnotes:** Escort - the best way I can define one is a "higher quality prostitute". Kind of like literally buying a date, you can hire them just for their company and nothing more...but that's not usually the case...You normally have to contact their agencies to contact them, and they normally charge higher fees (don't ask me how I know all this)

So then, does this make Matthew Alfred's pimp? o_O -shot- And yes, Alfred goes to Harvard University...you can so tell I have a kink for him being smart...OTL

Comments? Questions? Please drop a review ^_^


	2. Hook, Line, and Sinker

**A/N:** ...Did I mention before that this is my first time trying to write a romance-ish fic...? Because it is so it'll turn into horseshit I'm sure XD

Anyways, I noticed that in a lot of stories that it follows the "chaser" of the relationship rather than the "chased". So I thought, 'why not switch it around?' and so it's Alfred's thoughts you'll be hearing instead of Arthur's. Remember, he _is_ the cold hearted snake and all star in this fic, so enough of my yapping and let's see what Alfred has up his sleeves~

* * *

Alfred really didn't know what to expect from this "date", but nonetheless entered the fancy parlor to look for Matthew's landlord. The younger brother had told him that Arthur already reserved their seats to be in the back of the place somewhere. And this was enough for the blond to figure out, judging by the emptiness of the area where only one other blond sat at a table with one other chair available. Before approaching him, Alfred breathed deeply and took the hands out of his black suit pants.

_Show time!_

When he was standing about two feet away from the figure, Alfred asked in a smooth voice "Excuse me, but is this seat taken?"

The other male looked into Alfred's blue eyes before saying "Ah it's you," he briefly glanced at his watch, then back at Alfred. "Right on time, p-please have a seat."

"Why thank you sir," the younger blond said politely. But before sitting down on the ornate chair next to him, he extended his hand out to Arthur. "I'm very sorry for my brother's brief introduction of me. I'm Alfred Jones," he gave the other male a dashing smile.

Arthur abruptly stood up from his chair and took the offered hand immediately. "My name is Arthur Kirkland, pleased to meet your acquaintance."

"Oh, the pleasure is all mine, Mr. Kirkland." Perhaps Alfred said it a bit too suggestively, because it earned him a cough from the other blond.

Once the two of them took their seats, Alfred looked around the area curiously. "My, what a marvelous place! You have great taste, sir."

"I-it's nothing, I come here often," Arthur said humbly, looking anywhere but the sapphire orbs staring at him.

"Is that so?" Alfred's eyes started wandering themselves, taking in the delicate paintings adorning the flourished walls, the pots of flowers mounted on the side with their vines crawling out. There was a chandelier hanging above them, shedding light on the silverware and porcelain, making them glitter like stars. The table itself smelled of mahogany, covered with a laced cloth of intricate designs. To his right, there was a short wall that stood around four feet tall to separate their little section from another customer. Lilies were planted on top of the wall and the leaves free to droop on either side.

_What a swanky restaurant! Must be for rich people only or something…did Matthew say Arthur was going to pay the check or me?_

While they waited to be served, Alfred thought this was a good time as any to check the guy he was supposed to be interested in. His best trait was probably his eyes – a deep emerald color.

_Eh, sandy blond hair…kinda has that mop-head look. The accent is a nice touch I guess…And who does the eyebrows? _

The landlord wore a black three-piece suit, a one up from Alfred's own simple dress shirt, suit pants and tie (which he was forced to wear).

_Yeah…a total stiff…damn it Matt!_

Arthur cleared his throat, fidgeting a bit and a light shade of red appearing on his cheeks.

_Whoops, was I caught checking him out? Wait…I'm so not! I'm merely analyzing the person I'm forced to talk to…Oh well, this will all chalk up to Mattie's idea of "showing interest in him"_

"So, Alfred, what is it that you do?"

"I'm sorry, but can you be a bit clearer on that?" Alfred requested and smiled casually at the older blond.

"I…I meant to ask for your occupation," Arthur clarified.

"Oh, I'm an astronaut-in-training," Alfred lied. That was what he wanted to be when he was a kid, but the cost and requirements to get into that field was too much for him. Instead, the closest he got was majoring in aerospace engineering at his college.

"That's amazing, how is the training?"

"Quite physically demanding," Alfred scratched the back of his head, not really knowing what he was saying.

_Whatever impresses the guy…_

Before Arthur could ask another question, a suited waiter appeared and served them what the sandy blond probably ordered before Alfred got there. Alfred thanked him, and raised the cup, making sure that his pinky was out (just to humor the landlord) before taking a sip of what he thought was soda.

"Guh-!" If it was any other situation, Alfred would have spat the substance he just put into his mouth at the person across from him. But fully aware of what he had to do, the blond instead slowly released the tea from his mouth back into its cup. The action may have been nasty, but not as nasty as the actual substance.

"Alfred, is something wrong?" Arthur sprang up from his chair, worry etched into his features.

Pretending to swallow, Alfred lowered the cup and gingerly placed it back onto its saucer. He then looked directly into green eyes. "Nothing is wrong, Mr. Kirkland. Just the fact that I just had the best cup of tea in my entire life," he smiled softly.

"Ah, I'm glad you're enjoying yourself," relief flooded Arthur, and Alfred noticed that the landlord was less tense, sitting back down awkwardly.

Learning to avoid his drink, Alfred instead focused on the pastries. He was about to dig in when he heard someone clear his throat.

_Oh right, elbows off the table…_

At least the cookies and cakes tasted good. To avoid suspicion, he would pretend to take a sip of the tea, but was just putting the cup to his lips, fake the swallowing, and place the cup back down with all of its tea still in it. And it may have just been his imagination, but the blond felt as though green eyes were looking at him for longer than he'd felt comfortable. After pretending to drink tea three more times, Alfred coughed three times before excusing himself. "Mr. Kirkland, if you won't mind, is it alright if I go to the restroom?"

"You don't need to ask my permission for such a thing, go right on ahead."

"Thank you, sir." He flashed Arthur another dazzling smile before heading towards the bathroom.

"What's wrong?" Alfred heard someone ask him from behind while he was rinsing his mouth of the foul tea at the sink.

"Everything! Why didn't you tell me this was some sort of tea parlor?" The older brother whirled around to face Matthew. He had asked the younger to come along and spy on them in case Arthur pulled a fast one and spiked his drink when he wasn't looking. Matthew had argued that Arthur wasn't like that and that it was during the afternoon, but Alfred would hear none of it and wouldn't go unless Matthew went as well. Yup, he was that paranoid.

"Why am I not surprised that you didn't read the sign on top of the building?"

"So you purposely didn't tell me exactly where we were going?" Alfred narrowed his eyes at his brother.

"W-well…I know how much you hate tea-"

"With a passion, baby!"

"Right, so I didn't tell you. Otherwise you would have never gone…" Matthew looked down at the tiled bathroom floor, feeling ashamed of lying to his brother.

"Whatever, can I just end it now? It's been a good 45 minutes and these clothes are killing me!" Alfred emphasized his distress by tugging on the striped tie around his neck. "Plus I'm tired of being so polite,"

"But you're doing so well. Your 'awesome acting' is working,"

"Maaaattie!" the name came out as a long whine.

"Alright, alright. But make sure you don't sound like you don't like his company or something eh,"

Alfred smiled with relief at the fact that he would be out of here soon. "Gotcha!" With that, he left Matthew inside the bathroom to walk back to Arthur, who was patiently waiting for his return. "I'm sorry to keep you waiting,"

_Hey…did someone drink my tea for me or something?_

"It's no problem, Alfred," Arthur continued to eye him while he sat down again. "Your tie is crooked,"

"Hm?" Alfred looked down and indeed saw that the accursed thing was out of place. "Would you be so kind as to fix it for me?"

"Yes of course," the Englishman answered a little too quickly.

Once that ordeal was done, the two blonds exchanged a bit more small talk before Alfred looked at his wrist watch and feigned surprise. "Well would you look at the time! I was enjoying myself so much that I forgot I had to help Matthew pack up his things for moving,"

"Wait, do you two live with each other?"

"Yes, I moved from Massachusetts to live with my brother again. But it is so unfortunate that just as I arrived here, he cannot pay his rent and so the two of us have to find a new place to live," he put on a sad smile. "In fact, we may even have to go to Canada," he added as a safety measure.

"Oh…I see…" Arthur said softly, guilt laced in his voice. "B-but, can't you help your brother pay it?"

Alfred had no choice but to corner the landlord. Still smiling sadly at him, he shook his head slowly and looked into emerald orbs. "I truly wish I could, but because I had to spend a lot of money to move in, I'm afraid it'll be a while until I can help Matthew out."

Arthur was rendered speechless, his eyes focusing on the plates as he nodded his head to indicate his understanding.

"It's not your fault, Mr. Kirkland. You're only doing your job as a landlord, and a good one from what I can tell," he said before getting up from his chair. "I'm glad we were able to talk like this before I have to move again. Now, please excuse me," Leaving Arthur with his thoughts, Alfred turned around to the exit with a smirk on his face.

_Hook, line, and sinker_

X.X.X.X

The next morning, the photographer heard someone knocking on his door. "Just one moment, please," he said loud enough so that the person on the other side of the door was able to hear him. Putting down the article he was reading from the magazine company he was working for, he opened the door to see Arthur standing there. "Oh, Mr. Kirkland…I'm so sorry, but I just can't pay for this apartment any longer. Just give me until this afternoon and I'll be out of here," Matthew sounded pleading, even though none of his belongings were stowed away in cardboard boxes.

Arthur failed to notice this though, and instead stuck out an envelope. "You won't have to worry about that, lad."

"What's this eh? Debt?" Matthew took the white letter from his landlord and inspected it, acting surprised.

"No…it's your new rent payment. Apparently, there has been a mistake with the amount you actually have to pay. By the way, where's Alfred?" he asked while trying to look past Matthew and into the living room of the apartment.

"He's at a friend's house right now because this is the last day he'll get to see them," Before Arthur could voice his objection, Matthew added "Even if the rent is lower, I'm afraid I can't pay it right away…that's why I think we still have to move,"

"…I forgot to mention that I'll postpone the due date until the end of next month. Will that be enough time for you?"

"Oh, more than enough! Thank you so much," Matthew thanked the Englishman gratefully. He didn't even bother asking why Arthur had a sudden change of heart.

"Don't mention it, lad. And when you see Alfred again, can you tell him that I had a great time talking to him the other day? He is quite the gentleman,"

"I'll be sure to do that the moment he comes back, sir,"

"Well then, I'll be on my way."

After waving his landlord off, Matthew couldn't help but smile widely. He opened the envelope and found that the fee was reduced tremendously…almost to the same amount he had to pay when the previous landlord was around.

_I can't believe this…he somehow managed to pull it off!...Just as planned_

_

* * *

_

**Endnotes:** Spot the Death Note quote! -shot- I forgot to say this before, but I teared up at the number of people interested in this fic...THANK YOU guys! Especially those who reviewed and expressed their opinion on it, you guys are the best~

Once again, Matthew is invisible, but this time it was a good thing! XD Yes, he was spying on them the whole time (who do you think reminded Alfred to take his elbows off the table?)

Anyways, I hope this chapter didn't fail too much and as always, if you have questions and comments or want to throw me off a cliff, just let me know through a review~


	3. You Laugh, You Lose

**A/N:** I'm very sorry for the slow update (expect more of them), but life hasn't been kind to me. Anyway, I guess now is a good time to address the main concern: I never would have guessed that the other chapter evoked that much of a reaction...but the previous chapter, although a bit harsh, was essential and if not the main thing the story is based on. Still, I hope you'll enjoy this next addition. It's kind of a filler but...something to lighten the mood from the last chapter? (Just saying, I have a weird sense of humor)

On behalf of Alfred, let me explain his actions a bit: he is kind of spiteful towards Arthur for what he did to Matthew when he wasn't around (basically threatening to kick him out of his apartment).

Because really, can you really love someone who was about to leave one of your relatives homeless, thus pulling you into the problem?

However, because he has to seduce him to help Matthew, he really has no choice but to act cordial (that however, doesn't mean that he can't become rather "evil" behind his back). Still, I want to say right now that although Alfred appears very manipulative, he knows that what he's doing is wrong (as mentioned in Chapter 1). But given the situation, he's stuck between a rock and a hard place. If it makes you feel better, this guilt will become more and more apparent.

And I don't have anything against Arthur.

* * *

"Oh…my…god! It's soooo hooooot!" Alfred repeated for the umpteenth time while lying on the couch. "Matt, fix the goddamn AC…"

"I heard you the first time, but I don't have the money to fix it right now," poor (still in both sense of the word) Matthew quipped back at his brother from the kitchen, making them lunch. "Plus, it'll just break again once it gets fixed,"

"Guuuuhhh, I'm frying!"

"At least you're not the one in the hot kitchen cooking eh?"

"But we had a deal remember? Thanks to me going on that 'date' a couple of days ago you're able to keep your apartment. Now where's my sandwich woman?"

"For your information, I'm making pancakes. Also, we're not in a TV sitcom, so you can drop the acting for now,"

"Hey, not my fault I'm so good at it. Besides, you should be grateful…seeing as though it won the heart of your landlord," the older smirked, knowing fully well that Matthew cannot deny that fact. The drama and acting class he took back in high school paid off after all, even though it wasn't his first choice. But because the student procrastinated and turned in his course sheet late, he was shoved into that class against his will. Still, in addition to his major, he did fairly well in the acting department.

"Now if only you were a mechanic who can fix the air conditioner yourself…" Matthew wished aloud.

"I'm a hero, not a repairman," Alfred groaned and planted his face on one of the arms of the sofa. "The fat lady just sang…"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Before the wise older brother could provide an explanation, a knock came from the front door. And even though the door was only a few feet away from where Alfred was still sprawled on the furniture in the living room, he lazily hollered "Come in, it's not locked!"

Arthur opened the door, and was hit by a wave of heat as well as a rather astonishing sight. Both brothers were in the apartment – Matthew busy flipping pancakes in a frying pan while Alfred was busy being unproductive…and drop-dead gorgeous! Because of the weather, both weren't wearing much; the younger had a decent red t-shirt on. Alfred on the other hand was wearing nothing more than a thin, white tank top and baggy jeans and sweating. "A-Ahem." He coughed out nervously.

"Al, Arthur's here," Matthew hissed at the inattentive blond.

"Wha-oh," Alfred snapped his head up from the couch arm to look at the fidgeting landlord. "Is that you Mr. Kirkland? I'm sorry, my glasses are a bit fogged up," he slowly removed them from his face, blew at the lenses, and wiped them clean with the hem of his tank top, revealing a bit of tanned skin and toned abs. By the time he was done with the whole process and placed the glasses back on, he saw that the sandy blond was blushing.

_Whoa…I guess Mattie wasn't lying when he said this guy has the hots for me…_

"Is there something I can do for you, sir?" Alfred sat up on the couch and crossed his legs.

"I…uh…were you sleeping on the couch?" Arthur sputtered, not really knowing what to say at the moment.

"Yes, there's only one bed in this apartment, and it belongs to Matthew,"

"Psh," the blond heard his brother scoff in the back. "If anything, you're the one sleeping on it…"

"Don't look so sad Mr. Kirkland, it's not so bad once you get used to it," the older brother tried to turn the Englishman's attention back to him, which wasn't that hard to do.

"But I take it that something else discomforts you?" Arthur eyed the sputtering air conditioner unit, but immediately looked back at Alfred.

"Yes, and I don't know when it'll get fixed," he added distraughtly, peering at the landlord with sad, sapphire eyes.

"If you like, I'll call the company to fix it free of charge," Arthur offered not a moment too soon than Alfred and Matthew expected. "I-in the meantime, you can stay a while in my apartment…i-it's cooler…"

Alfred immediately accepted. "Really? Thanks so much!" He bounded over to the smaller blond, giving him a genuine and friendly hug.

"Alfred, let him go…I think he's hyperventilating," Matthew chided in a hushed tone.

"Oh, where are my manners! I'm so sorry sir," the blond did as he was told and released the man from his embrace. "I just wanted you to know how grateful I am for your philanthropy," He turned back to Matthew and gave him a wink and thumbs-up.

_Put that on a t-shirt and sell it!_

The younger only rolled his amethyst eyes at the attempt to sound smart.

Alfred didn't know what was wrong with him, but Arthur sure fell for it.

"Ah…you're very welcome. Should we get going then?"

Before heading towards the threshold (and when he was sure Arthur couldn't hear him), Alfred asked "Hey Matt, ya wanna come with? There's AC~"

Matthew truly considered it, but shook his head in the end. "It's alright, I'm used to it. Besides, the pancakes are ready; and this is a great opportunity for the two of you to get to know each other better."

"Alright, suit yourself!" He waved back at his brother before closing the door to follow Arthur down the hallway.

X.X.X.X

_Wow! This must be like a penthouse!_

He supposed it was just because he had low standards when it came to housing, but compared to Matthew's apartment, the landlord's apartment was luxurious. It was so much more spacious with seashell white walls. The kitchen connected to the living room was nicely tiled and neat. And the AC unit in one of the windows was doing its job and keeping the apartment cool. Alfred remained standing and absorbing the new environment until Arthur told him to take a seat on the black leather couch.

"Make yourself comfortable while I make some tea,"

It was a lot of effort not to scrunch his face up at the word. He wanted some coffee, but that would sound "rude". Sighing softly, Alfred once again forced himself to cross his legs and arms. The living room he was sitting in was a bit bigger than the one he was currently mooching at, and by the looks of the neatly arranged books on the shelf…

_Is that embroidery?_

The blond peered at the art work and tried to make out what the stitches were forming.

"It's ready," Alfred almost jumped out of his skin when he heard the landlord's voice.

"Oh…" Both looked at each other, mimicking the other's shocked expression. "Ah, Mr. Kirkland, I didn't know you were living with someone," Alfred started nervously, gingerly placing the unfinished product back down on the small table sitting next to the sofa.

_He must have friends staying over or something, yeah…"girlfriends"_

Arthur, tea tray still in his hands, looked away, clearly abashed. "No one is living with me…I…I made that…" Slowly placing the tray on the table in front of the other blond, he remained standing and avoiding incredulous blue eyes. "I didn't expect anyone to visit…so I carelessly left it out to work on later…"

Thank the Heavens Arthur wasn't looking at Alfred, for he would've seen how hard the taller blond was biting on his bottom lip to suppress his laughter.

_Must…not…laugh…I can't blow this! I won't have a place to stay for the rest of my vacation…and that'd suck! Oh, and it'll hurt his feelings…_

After a moment of what can be called awkward silence, Alfred thought he was ready and cleared his throat to get the landlord's attention. "There's nothing to be ashamed of, Mr. Kirkland," it was so hard to make his voice sound smooth and not shaking with snickers. It was also hard keeping a straight face when saying it. "I don't mean to sound suspicious, but was it really your fine craftsmanship that made this?" he raised the embroidery to take a better look at it.

Whether he was still quiet from embarrassment or shock, the sandy blond nodded his head to indicate that he was listening.

"I think it's a beautiful piece of art, and as I just said, there's nothing to be ashamed of. But if you're uncomfortable with it, I believe we were about to have tea…or would you rather I take my leave now?" Alfred was about to stand up when the other male responded.

"No…please stay a while…" the landlord's eyes were only looking at the carpeted floor. But then he raised his head and looked directly at Alfred. "Do you really believe my embroidery is that good?" emerald eyes were suddenly gazing at him cynically.

_Ooh, this is gonna be a tricky one to pull off…is he catching on?_

"Do you really have no pride in your work, Mr. Kirkland?" Alfred started, tracing a line in the art. "I may not be a professional at this, but it's painfully obvious that this was done with a practiced hand," he added with a soft smile while looking at the landlord in the eye. Standing up from the couch, he strode over to Arthur and gently grabbed the other's hand to place the embroidery in it.

The Englishman was taken by surprise and stiffened at the contact, but soon enough he was leaning into Alfred's chaste touch. And because of what the taller blond was wearing, he found himself staring at the muscular yet toned arms of the other. "Well…it is a hobby…" his eyes moved down to Alfred's lower half and stayed there.

Alfred chuckled inwardly.

_At least he's honest_

Just then the normally cheerful blond frowned slightly at the realization that he has been lying to the other man for a while now; but chose to push the thought away and released Arthur's hand. "So then, are we going to enjoy some tea before it turns cold?" Alfred sat back down and once again pretended to take a sip from one of the cups. Looking over the tea cup, he saw that the landlord joined him on the couch and gracefully drank the now lukewarm beverage. The embroidery sat on a cushion to Arthur's left, where it wasn't put back into its hiding spot.

When the atmosphere was less tense, the landlord said rather softly "Thank you…"

Alfred raised an eyebrow at this. "You were the one who invited me over and served me tea; it should be me who is thanking you sir-"

It was an odd feat when the gentleman interrupted the other blond. "You can just call me Arthur. We _are_ well acquainted are we not?"

_Oookaayy, maybe he is getting serious about this…_

Alfred glanced nervously to the side before replying "If that is what you wish…Arthur," the name sounded weird coming out of his mouth.

"That's better, now, would you like to stay over for dinner?" the landlord asked with renewed confidence.

"…Dinner?"

X.X.X.X

"Can you just give me a minute?" Matthew took his time getting up from the couch to answer the door that looked like it was going to fall off its hinges.

"Open the door Matt!" Alfred groaned from the other side, pounding on the innocent piece of wood vigorously.

"What's the matter Al-"

The older brother didn't even pay heed to his younger brother as he flitted past him and toward the bathroom; making it just in time to throw up in the toilet.

"Oh god…Alfred, are you okay? What in the world happened?"

When it appeared as though the blond was done, he lifted his head up and turned around to look at Matthew standing anxiously at the bathroom doorway. "It was horrible…so horrible…" he gasped out.

"What? The apartment?" the younger wasn't quite catching on to what his brother was saying.

"No! His cooking! By the gods was it horrible…" Alfred's eyes widened as though he was retelling a horror story. "It was so unearthly! He gave me this thing called marmite-" his head was stuck in the toilet bowl again at the mention of the food item. When everything he just ingested a moment ago left his system, Alfred slowly stood up from his stooped position in front of the toilet. He then continued with his story. "I was only there for the AC, but then he invited me for dinner. I thought we were gonna go to a restaurant, so I agreed…but it was actually him making the food," the cheerful blond paled a bit at the recollection. "No offense, but his scones were so burnt that I won't even feed them to a dog!"

"Wait, so are you still having dinner with him? How come you had to come over here and heave?"

"I'm still under the contract right? 'Cause I really think Arthur would appreciate it if I threw up right in front of him from eating his food," Alfred answered back sarcastically. "You have no idea how long I had to sit there, regurgitating tea and force-feeding myself until he finally called it a night,"

"You mean you held it all in for that long?"

"Like a boss, baby! Arthur didn't seem to notice my discomfort at all; seeing as though he was distracted by this!" Alfred flexed his arms but then clutched his aching stomach.

"Well, if it was as bad as you've described it…that was amazing," Matthew had to hand it to his brother.

* * *

**Endnotes:** Time is a very precious thing, and I don't want you guys to waste it if you're not enjoying reading this fic. So I'm sorry if I did waste your time but for those who are still with me, thank you and remember, criticisms and opinions are always appreciated. I want to know what you guys think because I care~


	4. Run, Run, Run

**A/N:** I'M SO SO SO SORRY! -prepares to do seppuku- I have failed all of you T_T It's been so long, almost a whole month since I last updated!

But I'm a very slow learner it seems. It's only now that I finally admit defeat; I can't write two stories at the same time (the "promised" sequel to my other fic) and juggle that with my school work. It is therefore, and I'm pretty sure that I already mentioned this in the previous chapter, that the updates for this story will be _very_ slow. I'm also so sorry for replying to all your reviews slowly...but I promise I'll get to them because if you guys were able to give a bit of your precious time to write a review, the very least I can do is say my thanks personally to each and every one of you.

-sigh- This month has been very hectic T_T. I still have to work on my essay and prepare for a presentation in front of judges (hopefully I won't shat myself in front of them, because man that would suck!)...at least my topic was on history ^.~ Anyways, sorry for this small rant, kind of wanted to vent/express to you all of what is happening in my messed up life XD Hopefully by early March I will be able to write and update more often. In the meantime, here is a measly chapter to sedate you all.

* * *

"What are you, some kind of troll?" Alfred flicked the lights on in the living room that was now Matthew's bedroom. It was already the afternoon, but the weather outside was partially cloudy, shrouding the town in a temporary gloom.

"Turn out that light eh?" Matthew glared at his older brother and put the magazine down.

"How can you read in the dark?" the older challenged.

"It's called using a flashlight and squinting your eyes. I don't want to use the ceiling lights because it raises the electricity bill."

"Wow, are you stingy or what?" Alfred teased, but understood his brother's predicament.

"Do you need to tell me something important? That's the only time you actually come up to me instead of calling me over,"

"Oh yeah!" Alfred again had that bright smile on his face. "Uh, if Arthur comes over or calls, can you tell him I'm not here?"

"Is something wrong?" The topic concerned him, seeing as though it wasn't related to video games or other frivolous matters and complaints.

"Yeah…I think he's getting the wrong idea that I actually like him…" Alfred scratched the back of his head. "But you know…I don't."

"Well, that was the plan…" Matthew pondered over it. "But you can't stop now! What about Arthur?" He coughed nervously. "And...my rent..."

"That's why I'll just avoid him for a while, and then he'll forget about me," Alfred sounded like he had this all thought out. "And hopefully he'll keep your rent that way,"

"That doesn't make sense," Matthew retorted.

"What's not to get – Crap!"

Knocking from the front door sent Alfred retreating into "his" bedroom and locking it.

"Alfred? Matthew? Are you in there?" a voice floated through the door.

Alfred opened the bedroom door a crack to whisper to Matthew "Don't let him in!"

But it was already too late. The doorknob on the front door turned by itself and somebody was letting himself in.

Before the door fully swung open and the figure was able to cross the threshold, Matthew dashed through the door Alfred was hiding behind and locked it. He passed a whimpering Alfred to open a window close to his bed. "There's a fire emergency ladder hanging on the side of the building. I think it's right on this floor, so all you have to do is start climbing; it should lead you to the rooftop."

The older blond didn't need any further explanation as he slipped into a pair of shoes closest to him and headed toward the window. After poking his head out, he looked to his left and indeed saw that there was a rusty ladder drilled into the side of the wall. He took a deep breath before jumping out and hanging onto one of the rungs. Once his feet touched the other rungs of the ladder, Alfred started climbing up, seeing as though it didn't reach the bottom of the building and only the floor Matthew's apartment was on. By the time he was above the window and reaching the third and top floor, he could hear something in Matthew's room.

"Um…Mr. Kirkland, what are you doing here? How did you get in?"

A bit bashful for his intrusion, the Englishman held out a master key. "B-but what were you doing, Matthew? I was waiting outside for a while now," he tried to avert attention from himself. "And who were you talking to?"

Matthew looked from the window to his landlord crossing his arms over his chest at the bedroom doorway. "I'm sorry, sir. But I didn't hear you knocking," he lied. He may not have been as good as his brother, but he had to try! "I was talking to myself because I was practicing my acting…remember when I said that I would get a second job?" he added when the other male raised a thick eyebrow.

"You were practicing in your own bedroom?" Arthur asked skeptically, looking from the blond to the empty room.

"I…I'm self-conscious…" Matthew began and played with his wavy hair. "But was your reason to be here so urgent that you had to break in? Couldn't it wait?"

"O-of course it couldn't!" the older blond stuttered. "Alfred left something back in my apartment, and I wanted to return it,"

The photographer could tell he was not telling the truth, for there was nothing in the landlord's hands.

_Alfred had nothing on him that day except his shirt and jeans, so unless…naw_

**Thump, thump, thump**

"What was that?" the sandy blond raised his head sharply toward the ceiling.

"What was what, Mr. Kirkland?" Matthew asked quickly.

"A noise, it sounds like it's coming from the rooftop,"

"I don't hear-"

**Thump, thump**

_Damn it Alfred you dunderhead!_

"M-maybe they're construction workers…" the other blond offered feebly.

"That can't be it; I never called for them, and whoever it is should know that it is a violation to go on the rooftop without approval." Arthur whirled around and was out of the bedroom.

Once the landlord's shadow was out of view, Matthew made for the window and yelled out "Arthur's coming up to the roof-!" He stopped with his warning when the photographer felt like he was being watched.

"Ahem." The landlord was at the doorframe again, tapping an impatient foot on the floorboards. "What are you doing?"

"Eh? Trying to get the person's attention…"

"Don't bother with that, now, if you'll excuse me," Matthew had no choice but to move aside and let the landlord climb out his window and onto the ladder himself.

"What the?" Arthur reached the top of the ladder only to find no one on the roof. Other than the nice breeze blowing and grey clouds parting to reveal slivers of sunshine, not a living thing was the source of the footsteps he heard when he was in the apartment. He turned his head left and right to view the rooftops of other neighboring buildings, but nothing was there.

"Do you see something, Mr. Kirkland?" Matthew strained to see what was happening from where he was poking his head outside the window. "The sound stopped, maybe it was just a cat or dog," he tried his best to hurry the other man back inside.

_How did he…?_

"I…suppose it was…" Arthur still sounded dubious, but nonetheless turned around from the vacant area, descended the ladder, and climbed back into the window.

_I'm totally cut out for the CIA!_

Hanging on the side of the building with only his hands grabbing the edge of the wall, Alfred was scaling along the side to avoid getting caught. When he heard Arthur going back inside Matthew's bedroom, he quickly made his way toward the wall with the ladder on it to safely perch there until the landlord left the apartment. He was smart enough to stay out of sight while still being able to listen in on the conversation.

"Sir, if you would just give me Alfred's belonging, I'll give it back to him when he comes home. There's no need to come all the way here just to return something Alfred forgot; it's not worth your time,"

"I guess…" Arthur's voice was tinged with disappointment. "I'm sorry for the intrusion…I hope you didn't find it rude of me to do such a thing…"

"Of course not, sir. In fact, I think you're a-"

"Motherfucker!"

"Eh?"

The two in the room turned towards the window just in time to see a flash of blond pass by the frame and come crashing down to the ground below with a tremendous thud.

"Alfred?" Arthur was already out of the apartment.

The would-be-CIA was doing so well clinging onto the ladder until the rusty bolts just so decided to unscrew themselves from the brick wall and broke, sending someone down with them. Still clutching to the detached ladder in front of him, Alfred laid sprawled next to the bushes surrounding the building. "Ow…my aching-"

"Alfred! Are you alright?" the injured blond looked up to the window where the source of the voice was. "Can you get up? Arthur's coming down right now,"

"What!" he freaked, and tossed the rusty piece of metal aside to spring onto his feet. By the time he did this someone rounded the corner of the building and stared at him.

"Alfred, are you hurt?"

The taller blond didn't even hear a word from the landlord, for he was already one block away from where he originally was on the ground and still going.

However, Arthur did not give up on him so easily and chased him down the street.

"Run Al, run like the wind!" Matthew piped up from where he was at the window, watching the comical scene.

_I have to hide!_

It was a good thing that Alfred was at the top of the track team back at his college, for he was still ahead of Arthur by at least five blocks and gaining. But because of his fall from two stories, his back was killing him and he had to rest somewhere.

_I have to hide at a place he least expects me to be in…he still thinks I'm classy and all that…_He thought as his eyes restlessly glanced from one store to the next on both sides of the street.

_There!_

The athletic blond ran across the street without even looking both ways and barged into the safe haven that was McDonald's. When he was sure Arthur passed by the fast food restaurant (sneakily peering at the glass doors and windows), he thought that because he was here, he might as well buy an early lunch. Smiling at the cashier who, like everyone else in the place, was giving him odd looks, he casually strode over to her and ordered "Hi, can I have a double-cheese burger, large fries, and a super-sized Coke?" When he settled down on a table, still vigilant for a certain Englishman, Alfred thought about his future plans.

_Hm, I shouldn't go back to Matt's apartment for a while…maybe this is a good time to visit some friends_

* * *

**Endnotes:** What can I say? Arthur is literally chasing after the one he loves -gets shot- And is it me, or is he becoming more like Belarus? o_O

Also, I don't know squat about apartments, but as far as I know the fire escape ladder in my apartment building only hangs from the second floor and doesn't reach the ground. Why is that? Am I going to be any safer if I stay on top of the roof of a burning building or something?


	5. A Dangerous Mind

**A/N:** So...my teachers thought it would be funny to pile all my final exams in the same week as my presentation to the judges...-_- But then when I'm all ready they decide to cancel the presentation all together and schedule me for another time...I feel stupid trying to study for my tests and practice my speech at the same time. OTL

So yeah, with more time on my hands, here's another chapter. I was working on it for a time but when I heard about what happened to Japan, I really didn't feel like writing...it's like "Why should I have the pleasure of writing (something rather comical too) when others are suffering?" It didn't sit well with me but bah...I'm sorry for being emo T_T

Anyways, just saying right now, the chapter title is the same as the song "A Dangerous Mind" by Within Temptation. The band is awesome and a lot of their songs (including the mentioned one) can relate to this fic in some way (at least in my opinion...then again my opinions are crap XD).

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Within Temptation nor their song.

* * *

"Hey Mattie, yeah I'm fine, I'm hanging out with Kiku right now…Yeah…can you cover for me? What? You're hiding in a closet right now? Ha ha ha! Well, just tell him I was out for a late morning jog or something…I don't have my cell phone with me right now and make sure he doesn't find it in the bedroom. Well then tell him that I have a life and that it doesn't center on him. What do you mean that sounds mean? I'm only telling the truth. Anyways, just do what must be done okay Matt? Yup, bye!" Alfred shut the cell phone closed and handed it back to his friend. "Thanks Kiku, you're really a lifesaver you know that?"

The raven-haired male, Kiku Honda, bowed slightly while taking back his cell phone. "It really is no problem, Alfred," he said humbly. "If only you told me earlier that you came back to visit." The Japanese had no idea that his friend from Harvard had returned to the state of California until he heard a knock on his door and immediately invited the blond to have lunch with him at a sushi bar.

"Eh heh, sorry about that…but let's just say that I had a really big welcome-back surprise." Alfred laughed and scratched the back of his head.

Kiku peered at his friend for a moment, catching the small signs of anxiety and worry, but decided not to question the blond until he was ready to express his concerns himself. "Has your vacation been going well?" he asked casually.

After taking a gulp from his can of soda, Alfred answered "Well, it's been very interesting to say the least. But I sure wish I had a better place to stay at; Mattie's apartment is too small for the both of us!" Hoping that he gave enough hints, the college student almost pleaded "Do you think you can let me stay at your house for the rest of my vacation?"

Brown eyes widened a bit at the request, but suddenly fell as Kiku bowed his head in apology. "I'm so sorry, Alfred. As much as I would like for you to stay at my place, I have a business trip to go to in a couple of days…"

Having attended the same high school as Alfred and sharing the same hobby of playing video games, Kiku became a video game designer and works closely with those who write out the plot for the game. Business trips like these were common yet random.

"Oh…" Alfred tried to remain optimistic and smiled sadly. "That's okay! I'll just have to find someone else to mooch off of!"

Kiku smiled softly and offered "If it is of any help, won't you come over and test our latest game before I have to go on my trip? You can stay at my house until I have to leave-"

"Oh my god Kiku, thanks so much!" Alfred was already on his feet and hugging the life out of his smaller friend. "Two or three days is good enough, you're the best!"

"It's the least I can do, I'm sorry I couldn't offer more on such short notice," the strangled male managed to say, smiling and gently returning the gesture.

X.X.X.X

Exhausted from enjoying himself too much with his friends, Alfred eventually had to return to Matthew's apartment to get more money (he spent all of it on food). When he was on the street leading to the building, his mind started to wander.

_It's been a few days since Arthur last saw me. I'm sure he forgot all about me and is going after someone else already…shit…speak of the devil…_

Right in front of the building and standing stock still like one of the Queen's Guards back in his homeland, Arthur finally moved when he saw the taller blond approach the building. "Alfred! Where have you been?" The expression on the landlord changed from worry to relieved to anger in a few seconds after asking the question. "Why didn't you call or tell me you were off on a business trip?"

"I was in such a hurry that I forgot to bring my cell phone with me when I left," Alfred answered calmly, trying to conjure up an excuse with the bit of information given to him.

_So, was that what Mattie told him? I was on a business trip?_

"You see, the meeting was urgent, and I had to make my way there as quickly as possible. I wanted to inform you when I got there, but as soon as I stepped foot into the building, the meeting already started,"

"But…for five days…" Arthur's expression suddenly hardened when it appeared as though he remembered something. "And what kind of bloody meeting has you eating out at restaurants?"

"I-I beg your pardon?"

"Alfred Jones, tell me where you have really been!" Arthur demanded, earning odd glances from passersby on the street.

"Arthur, please calm down…I don't know what you're talking about," Alfred tried to lie. "I'll explain everything if you will just let me,"

His back already facing Alfred, the landlord snatched the taller blond by the wrist and hauled him to his apartment. When they were once again in the air conditioned living room, Arthur sat down on the black couch, pulling Alfred down next to him. "Well, explain why each day you were gone you were spending time with another man,"

"Uh…can you describe to me what they looked like?" Alfred implored. "I'm sure this is all a misunderstanding."

_Yeesh, a date, some flirting, a dinner, and this guy thinks we're a couple…_

Arthur scoffed. "Honestly, how can you possibly forget, one was a black-haired male while the other was a brunet. I'm sure that after you were physically affectionate towards them and ate with them that you wouldn't forget," The Englishman let his emotion get the better of him, failing to notice that he was playing right into Alfred's hands and giving himself away.

The other blond listened closely to the details, trying to suppress the chill that ran down his spine as he figured out how Arthur knew what he had been doing.

…_Stalker much?_

Alfred had no idea that Arthur was able to find him at that sushi bar with Kiku and actually trailed him to where his other friend was. He had spent the last five days (two at Kiku's, the other three at Toris Lorinaitis') unaware that his brother's landlord was following him around.

"So then, Alfred, how is this all a misunderstanding?" the question snapped Alfred out of his small shock-induced trance.

_This isn't good, I'm losing his trust…I have to think fast! Although, it's kinda cute that he's this jealous_

Knowing that it was best not to question Arthur on how he knew all these little details, Alfred cleared his throat and started out slowly but sternly "Arthur, are you implying that I'm not allowed to see other people?"

"What? D-don't twist the words…You can but…you know what I mean don't you…?" the landlord was taken aback by how the normally bright blue eyes were now glaring at him.

"No, I'm afraid I don't. To me, it sounds like you're not permitting me to meet up with anyone…not even my _friends_,"

"Friends?" Arthur dared to look up at Alfred at the same time cover his cheeks puffed up from frustration with one hand.

_His guard's down, now's my chance!_

"Ah, so this is where the misunderstanding lies," Alfred's expression softened, his grim features replaced with a broad smile. "Arthur, is it unusual to hug a friend you haven't seen for almost four years?"

Anger left Arthur's facial expression, but he still regarded Alfred skeptically. "Then how does that tie up with your business trip?"

_Now that he doesn't believe that I'm going out with Kiku and Toris, everything should fall into place…it's simply catching him off guard and derailing him from his train of thoughts_

"Well, after the little trip, I bumped into my former colleagues and we went out for dinner. Please remember that I used to live here with my brother until I had to move," Alfred scratched the back of his head to show humility. "It appears as though you only caught me when I was not doing my job…but please understand how happy I was to see my friends again," he chuckled softly.

"I…suppose…" Arthur replied cynically, crossing his arms over his chest.

_Damn…he's still not buying it! Time for more drastic measures…_

Not giving the other time to elaborate on his excuse, Alfred gingerly lifted Arthur's chin with his fingers in one swift motion so that blue eyes met green in a steady gaze. "Arthur," he cooed, rubbing his thumb along the other man's bottom lip. "Did you miss me that much?"

"W-what?" the landlord's cheeks immediately began to burn from the contact. "I…"

Alfred held back a smirk.

_Heh heh, change the topic of discussion by focusing on the person himself; if this doesn't work then I don't know what will!_

"I'm so sorry, will you ever forgive me?" he whispered into the other's ear, feeling the smaller male tremble slightly. Alfred pulled back teasingly and smiled innocently while waiting for an answer. But he had no idea that his method would backfire on him. Apparently, his acting was a bit _too_ convincing…and the Englishman got the right/wrong message.

Arthur still had a hold of him, gripping the hand that once held his chin and pulling him closer so that their noses were barely touching. When Alfred peered into his eyes, he noticed that they were half-lidded.

_Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit! He's gonna kiss me! What do I do now?_

Cheeks still flushed, Arthur finally replied gently "You git…of course I'll forgive you…I lo-wah!"

Alfred's body suddenly toppled over him, squishing the sandy blond underneath.

"Alfred, get off!" When the other blond remained unresponsive, worry wormed its way into Arthur. "Alfred…what's wrong?"

X.X.X.X

Alfred felt something weighted on his chest. Reaching up to feel what it was, he still couldn't quite get an idea.

_Uh...carpet? Really soft carpet?_

When he cracked an eye open, his breath caught in his throat when he saw a pair of emerald eyes looking intently at him. The landlord's head was resting on top of his chest and it was only then that Alfred realize his hand was carding through sandy blond hair. He quickly retracted his hand.

"Alfred, are you awake? Should I call an ambulance?" he heard an accented voice ask him from above. The weight on his chest was lifted as a bashful Arthur got up from his crouching position to dust himself off.

"No, it's alright," the American opened his other eye to find that he was lain out on the couch while Arthur was hovering over him, watching his every movement. "It's nothing really…I just never expected it to happen at such a time,"

"Never expected what to happen?"

The blond on the couch looked away bashfully before answering. "I have narcolepsy."

"Oh…"

When it appeared as though Arthur had nothing more to say, Alfred continued "Normally I have it under control, but I guess my business trip and excitement over seeing friends again got the better of me." Sitting up from the couch to gaze into wary green eyes, he asked "Now what was it that you were telling me before I fell asleep?"

The question caught the landlord by surprise and he had to compose himself again before replying "N-nothing…just that I'll let your absence slide."

Alfred smiled brightly at the words and slyly offered "I'm forever indebt to you, Arthur. How about I take you out for dinner…say, tomorrow night?"

"S-so sudden?" Was all he could stutter out.

"Is that an inconvenience?" Disappointment clung to the words.

"No…that sounds like a grand idea," Arthur gave the taller blond a small smile before sitting awfully close to the American.

"It's the least I can do to thank you for taking such great care of me while I was knocked out," Alfred returned the coy smile fondly.

* * *

**Endnotes:** Narcolepsy - a sleeping disorder characterized by sudden sleep attacks. The sleep attacks normally strike at the most inopportune times (i.e. driving, in the middle of an argument, and even during sex!) and can be triggered by intense emotions. The person normally falls fast asleep for less than 5 minutes. Convenient for Alfred eh?

Alright, as much as I love to add humor and crack to this fic, I must warn that because of its nature, there will always be a more serious and if not angsty undertone to it. So if something turns from humor to drama in a flash, don't be too surprised; it's just me failing as a writer.


	6. Brits Gone Wild

**A/N:** Guys, guys...there are very, very good excu- I mean reasons as to why I was dead for the longest time...

1) Two words: MORTAL KOMBAT! hehe...I got the latest one through the mail

2) Finals are so stressful...

3) Being sick while taking said finals is the worst!

Oh, but I'm sure you all had better things to do with your lives. On another note: -breaks down into tears- So many reviews! Are my eyes deceiving me? I nearly had a heart attack simply because I saw the number. Me love you all long time!

Also, perhaps it is just me, but there has been a UK/US "revolution" going on. So I just felt like I had to let you all know that this story is US/UK (even though it doesn't look like it at all lol)...because pining ukes are so cute~ I'm truly sorry that I didn't mention it sooner, but I really wanted to keep it as ambiguous as possible because I was focusing more on the lulz. Again, to those who are upset by this, I apologize for disappointing you.

Additionally, please take note of the genre change. I earnestly don't know how to catagorize to save my life (because is one-sided love and a fake relationship considered romance?) OTL But rest assured (well, considering it's from me...maybe not), I'll do my best to find a "satisfying" end to this rather...questionable situation.

**Warnings:** Please refer to the chapter title and all that it may imply.

* * *

Matthew honestly didn't know how much more he could take of this abuse, and was having second thoughts about their little deal.

"Hey Matt, I need another soda," Alfred waved the can before placing it next to all the other empty containers littered about the table.

"Can't you get it yourself? I'm trying to make breakfast here,"

It was then that Alfred paused his video game and set the controller down to look at his younger brother over his glasses. "Oh, okay then. I guess I have no choice but to drag my injured self up and get it myself. But because I'll break my back in the process, I'll just have to cancel the date with Arthur and…" he left the threat hanging.

"But…but…you fell from the apartment almost a week ago! And right after you fell you were still able to run at least a mile…you can't go back on your word like that…"

Alfred smirked and said "Hey, it's not my apartment on the line,"

"But it'll ruin your image!" Matthew desperately retorted.

"Not that that'll matter, seeing as though I don't have to see his face once I leave,"

"Okay, okay…just give me a minute…" Matthew put down the frying pan and headed towards the refrigerator to fetch Alfred his drink. When he walked over to the couch to set the new can of soda down on the table in front of his older brother, Matthew noticed that Alfred wasn't resuming his game and had a rather serious expression on his face.

"I think, that for both our sakes we end it…"

Matthew grew silent for a moment. "…No, for me it's not that bad but…Have you ever considered trying to fall for him?"

"Yeah…it's not working…we're complete opposites! Besides, it's not fair for Arthur. We should stop this before things get out of hand,"

"I know…but opposites attract don't they?" Matthew chose to ignore the twinge of guilt he felt at the moment.

"Chemically they do, but psychologically they do not because compatibility actually requires-"

"Alright I get your point…no need for you to get all technical on me," the younger raised his hands up in defeat.

Alfred smiled at the frustrated gesture. "Sorry, just wanted to get my point across,"

"I know you don't like it, but can you just keep it up for a few more days until I can find a second job?"

The older brother's expression softened at his sibling's earnest attempt to resolve his rent problem. "Alright, but you better find one quick before I screw up and Arthur ends up hating me on his own!"

"Thanks for the encouragement eh,"

"You're very welcome!" Alfred smiled broadly, completely ignoring the sarcasm in the other's voice and was about to grab the game controller again when something grey drifted across his face. "I smell pancakes!"

"Oh my god I forgot I was making them! They're burning!" Matthew shot up from the couch and ran for the frying pan now spitting fire at him. Turning off the stove and trying to battle the fire-breathing cooking utensil with salt, the photographer whipped his head around to glare at his brother sitting idly by and enjoying the view. "What are you staring at? Help me!"

"Does this mean we have to go out and buy breakfast…?"

X.X.X.X

After picking up the landlord from his apartment and driving him to a swanky restaurant (one that Matthew helped him pick out to suit the Englishman's taste), Alfred started to experience déjà vu as they were seated in a quiet corner of the restaurant and waiting for their orders. Again, Arthur was wearing a three-piece suit for the occasion. But Alfred matched that this time, wearing the exact same thing as the other blond except for a white outer coat, the American's one was black. The outfit irritated him and he chewed the inside of his cheeks to distract himself.

_Stupid Mattie! Why do I have to one-up from what I wore last time…to impress him?_

"So Alfred, what do you think about the truth?" the accented voice brought him back from his ranting spree in his head.

Alfred swallowed before parroting "The uh…truth?"

"That's right," Arthur looked directly into Alfred's eyes with his green ones.

"I'm…not quite sure what you're asking for…such an odd thing to question," he mentally kicked himself for being caught off guard and stuttering. He _was_ putting on a show after all.

"Well, I just figured that while we're waiting for our food to arrive that we take the time to get to know each other better," Arthur responded casually. "I'm curious about what you think the truth is."

Alfred slightly bit his bottom lip as he tried to come up with an "appropriate" answer.

_Damn it…of all the things he could talk about it had to be about the truth…is this some sort of test?_

With the Englishman still gazing at him steadily, the taller blond exhaled before presenting his thoughts. "I believe that the truth is like the sun," he started.

Arthur's eyes widened a bit at the comparison. "The sun? How so?"

"One can't look straight at it and must avert his eyes," Alfred explained rather pessimistically. But when he saw how Arthur's face dropped a bit at the answer, he immediately added "However, it is the same light from the truth that banishes the shadows of doubt, speculation, and fear."

At this, Arthur rested his chin on the back of his hands as he leaned forward on the table. "What an interesting perspective," he sighed in awe.

"Thank you," Alfred leaned back on his chair to make up for the distance Arthur gave up.

_And if you get too close to it…it'll burn you_

It was then that Arthur looked away but asked "Then what do you think is l-love?"

Alfred grimaced inwardly at the question but again tried to come up with an answer that will satisfy the landlord.

_What is this, Philosophy 101?_

"Hmmm," this question was a bit trickier to answer. Alfred has never really thought about the concept since the college he went to always demanded his full attention. He knew what it looked like and _exactly_ how to show it, but never actually felt the emotion before. He thought about throwing in clichés, but decided to come up with an intelligent answer instead that will subliminally warn Arthur that he wasn't interested in him. When he thought he got it down, Alfred took a sip from his coffee and looked at Arthur, who was waiting expectantly. "Such a broad topic…don't you think? Love can be defined in so many ways, and the word has lost its true value because people use it for everything nowadays," When Arthur nodded his understanding, Alfred continued to ramble on in order to stall for time. "I mean, people use the word sometimes to exaggerate something, and it's hard to take someone seriously when they tell you they love you…" Alfred paused to let the words sink in. Sapphire eyes staring acutely for any signs that he got the hint, the taller blond was sorely disappointed when he got no reaction from the Englishman.

Arthur was still looking at him, but this time with half-lidded eyes and a small smile on his face. To his left, the wine glass was half full. "Hn," was all that came out from the landlord.

The staring was making Alfred uncomfortable, and he fidgeted before trying to compose himself again.

_Damn it get a hold of yourself! I can't slip up!_

Deciding that he should lay the hint a bit heavier, the American bluntly stated "Unfortunately, love is a fleeting feeling and will wither and die with the times…I sometimes think that such a thing doesn't exist in this world,"

The cynical view made Arthur snap out of his trance and he sat up at the words. "But Alfred, surely you've heard of 'love at first sight'…that can't be a fleeting feeling can it?"

"I believe it's called an infatuation, and is tested by time. But tell me, do you believe in something like that?"

"Yes," Arthur answered more hastily than he should have.

Alfred smiled warmly at the reaction he just received.

_What a hopeless romantic…_

"Then can you please explain to me why you do and tell me what you think love truly is?" Alfred was just about out of ideas on the topic and wanted to enjoy his coffee and meal that just arrived after his little explanation.

As the night wore on (too slowly in Alfred's opinion), the more drinks Arthur had, the more he seemed to open up to his "date"; from purely lecturing the poor blond on deep subjects to complaining how some tenants back at the building drove him crazy, and all the way to his past with other people he had met. From what he could gather (he was phasing out between where he was and where he wanted to be), the fact that made Alfred feel sorry for the landlord was his history with previous dates. The gentleman poured his heart out to them and in return, they broke up with him after a date or two.

"They never told me what I did wrong, but just left me in silent pity and courtesy…I don't need that damn it!"

Alfred eyed the number of empty wine and beer bottles before turning his attention to the Brit.

_Maybe if you didn't fall in love so easily…you wouldn't have your heart broken so many times…_The thought made him cringe slightly and a frown wormed its way onto his lips.

_I'll be the next one to break his heart…_

"It's getting late, we should get going," Alfred sprung up from his seat to stretch. It wasn't easy eating when one's back always had to be straight.

Arthur tried doing the same, but staggered and swayed once he was on his feet.

Alfred caught the signs of being tipsy, and went around the table to support the other man. "Let me help you get to the car," he politely offered.

The drunken man opened his mouth to object, but clammed up once he realized how close the American was to him, an arm around his shoulders to prevent him from falling flat on his face.

The two slowly made their way to Matthew's vehicle (there was no way Alfred could afford a car – he was a poor college student!) after he paid the check; and was it a very pricey one indeed with all the liquor the landlord kept ordering. Once there, Alfred opened the back door and practically threw an obviously smashed Arthur off of him and into the backseat.

_He won't remember anything that happened here anyways_

Buckling up the Englishman was no easy task…for he would always snatch and fondle with his date's hands whenever his coordination allowed him to. The fact that he kept swaying to and fro or leaning against Alfred when he got the chance irritated the American as well. "Come on, Arthur, work with me here,"

The landlord slurred something unintelligibly, giving that one second for Alfred to properly put the belt around his waist and click it before making his way to the driver's seat.

The whole world was against Alfred that night. Not only did the light turn red everytime he got to it, but so many more pedestrians were jaywalking or taking their sweet time crossing the street that the impatient blond wanted to smash his head against the steering wheel over and over again until he was knocked unconscious. He was about to do just that when a figure appeared right in front of the headlights and he slammed the brakes, the car stopping with a grating screech.

"Watch where you're goin' ya fool!" the irate pedestrian hollered as he stalked over to the stalled vehicle.

Not wanting more trouble, Alfred simply rolled down the window and said with a strained smile "I'm so sorry, sir. But I honestly didn't see you there,"

The albino in front of him gaped in horror, clearly offended. "How can you not see the awesome me crossing the street?"

"You were jaywalking...at night...wearing dark clothing..." he provided, hoping the other male could piece it all together.

Apparently the pedestrian was more vain than logical. "These clothes make me look sexy! You could've killed the awesome me!"

"Ya wanna switch places, buddy?" Alfred offered. "Because I'd much rather get run over than deal with a drunkard sitting in the backseat of my car,"

"What-"

As if on cue, the supposingly sedated Brit sprung to life and exclaimed "Why did we stop? Are we there yet?" But after his short outburst, grew quiet again...too busy petting something that wasn't there.

The man outside the car simply cackled at the American's misfortune.

"Yeah...pity me..." Alfred pouted and had one hand on the wheel while the other was dangling lazily outside of the car.

"I know how you feel man, my brother gets drunk sometimes too. And believe me when I say this - he becomes an animal,"

This caught the blond's attention. "So how do you deal with him?"

The albino smirked as he answered "Nothing works better than tying him up and locking him in his own room until morning,"

Alfred couldn't help but chuckle at the ill advice. "Thanks dude, and I'm sorry about almost running you over earlier,"

"It's nothing, takes more than a car to take me down ya know!" the stranger grinned.

The two fist bumped before Alfred drove off.

Things were just looking up when the man in the backseat woke up and couldn't keep his mouth shut, yelling obscenities out the window or laughing with these things he called faeries. And just when Alfred thought it couldn't get any worse, he stiffened in his seat when he felt hands around his torso.

_Great…he's touching me in uncomfortable places…_

From behind, Arthur reached around so that his arms could encircle the blond in the front. "Mmm, Alfred…I'm so lonely back here," he whined, his breath reeking of alcohol.

Blue eyes wide, Alfred turned around just enough to see that Arthur took off the seat belt and was pressing his body against the driver's seat. Gently swatting the groping hands away, he chided "Control yourself Arthur, we're almost to your apartment,"

Before Arthur could elaborate on what Alfred was saying, the American stepped on the gas abruptly and sent the landlord back against his seat. "I feel nauseous now…"

"Matt's gonna kill me if he finds puke in his car…" Alfred muttered under his breath, silently praying that the Englishman could hold it in until they got out of the vehicle.

Somehow, they did make it back without anyone throwing anything up. And although Alfred really didn't want to, he helped the landlord to his apartment on the third floor. Once there, he left the drunken man in front of his own door, saluted with a "Have a nice evening!" and turned on his heel when a slurred voice behind him made him stop.

"I can't find my keys…"

_Not my problem…_Alfred wanted to tell him, but instead said "Oh dear, did you have them with you when you left the building?"

"I think I left them in my front pocket…care to get them for me, love?" Arthur asked suggestively, sending Alfred a sly grin.

The unfortunate blond shuddered, trying to suppress the small blush on his cheeks. "Uhh…can't you get them yourself? I'm sure you're more than capable of doing so," he threw back as calmly as possible. He remained standing where he was away from the landlord and watched the spectacle before him.

Arthur pouted slightly before reaching into his pockets to fish out the keys. Now this was the funny part: after successfully finding the keys, the clumsy sandy blond dropped them and bent over to retrieve them, only to hit his head against the wooden front door of his apartment. He then started cussing at the door as if it was a real person and kicked it.

Alfred couldn't help but guffaw at the sight. Feeling heroic, he strode over to the blond rubbing his aching head and picked the keys up for him. "Let me get that for you, sir." He unlocked the door and led the drunk into his own living room. When he was close enough to drop the keys on the stand next to the leather couch, Alfred whirled around, ready to leave the landlord to his own devices. "What?"

"Where do you think you're going, Alfred," the Englishman purred the name out, mischief twinkling in his hazy, emerald eyes. He already closed the front door behind him, blocking it with his body.

"Back to Matt's apartment of course," Alfred responded, eyeing the man in front of him uneasily. "You're drunk. You should get some rest."

"But the night is still young, surely we can find a way to pass the time…" Arthur was already working on loosening his tie and trying to unbutton his dress shirt. Too bad he was as seductive as a drunken chicken, swaying around and knocking over china left on display to the side of the wall.

_Maybe I should call the cops..._

Alfred cautiously backed away from the perverted Englishman. "Dude, let's not go there…you're not thinking straight…" he didn't care if he sounded improper...the landlord's gone mad!

"Come now, Alfred, I know you want this…I've seen the way you've been staring at me," Arthur was rapidly closing the gap between himself and Alfred.

"Yeah…no…you've got it all wrong man…" the taller blond was looking all around the room to find something to hit the drunk with. He gasped when the back of his leg hit the black couch behind him.

_Shit!_

Sensing the moment to catch his prey, Arthur let out a low growl before pouncing, expecting to have an American pinned beneath him; but found his world turning upside down and that it was he who landed on the furniture first, Alfred standing next to him. "Wha-"

_And Mattie thinks watching kung-fu movies are a waste of time!_

The relieved look Alfred had on for a second fell as he saw Arthur smirk up at him. "Ah, so you like it rough,"

_There's no end to his perverted remarks!_

It was a good thing Alfred was used to drunkards back at his college, and remembering the advice he just received from the pedestrian he almost ran over, an idea came to mind. Before Arthur got a chance to right himself up from the sofa and attempt another assault, Alfred grabbed the loosened tie around his neck and instead wrapped it around his head, using it as a makeshift blindfold. "That's right, so why don't you be a good boy and stay right there…I have a surprise for you," he whispered huskily into the shorter male's ear.

Arthur's cheeks instantly turned redder and he mewled in anticipation, doing as he was told.

Now that the pervy landlord was sedated for a while, Alfred searched around the area for rope. To his dismay, he only found a few books written by Shakespeare, teacups, and saucers lying around the apartment.

"Alfred, what's taking you so long?~" Arthur asked in a sing-song voice.

"In a minute…love…" the American scrunched his face up at using the term of endearment. Thinking fast, he went into the hallway and grabbed the fire hose out of its glass case (this was an emergency damn it!) and dragged it in to where Arthur was still laying prostrate on the sofa. Pulling the man up so that his back was against the leather cushion, Alfred had to stop what he was doing when arms clung to his sides.

"I love you, Alfred Jones," the Englishman mumbled into his chest.

"Damn it Arthur…" he pried the hands off him before setting to work and wounding the hose round and round the couch, strapping Arthur to it in the process.

Because of the alcohol, the sandy blond's body was already restrained before he could even ask what was going on but giggled nonetheless. "I never knew you were into bondage,"

"Are you against it?" Alfred allowed his hot breath to tickle the other man's ear before withdrawing from the bound body.

Blindfold still on him, Arthur licked his lips – an indication that he didn't object.

"Good…good…" the American ran his index finger along Arthur's neck before going around back and tightening the knot of the hose/makeshift rope. As a parting gift, he chastely kissed Arthur on the cheek before leaving the bound man and closing the door behind him. "Sleep tight~"

* * *

**Cooking 101: **Grease fires cannot be put out with water. In fact, I think it makes it worse. So the best method is to first turn off the stove and put a lid on top of the pan or pour salt or baking soda over the flame.

**Psychology 101:** When Alfred mentioned how psychologically opposites don't attract, it's because compatibilty follows the "like likes like" principle more than it does the "opposites attract" theory. This however, isn't always true~

**Endnotes:** Alfred gives love a bad name! -breaks out into song and gets shot-

Ahem, so I've noticed in a few stories that when a person gets drunk, either everyone around him turns into defenseless moe blobs or the drunk person gains super-strength and can beat everyone around him...Either way, the drunk person gets his way. But not in this one! Sorry folks~ I kind of can't stand those situations...

Oh I forgot to mention this way before, but I would like to dub Al and Matt the "Devious Duo" in this fic for obvious reasons. And yes, Alfred judo-flipped Arthur onto the couch...wearing a black three-piece suit...please don't judge me T_T


	7. Intelligent Boys

**A/N:** The title of this chapter is very misleading.

**Warnings:** For those who do not like surprises: slight foreplay and OCC-ness (as always)

* * *

"Why didn't you tell me he couldn't hold his liquor?"

"How was I supposed to know? Besides, it's your fault you allowed him to order his own drink!"

"What was I supposed to do? Be a nanny and tell him what he can and can't drink? And it's your fault I even had to go out with him in the first place!"

"Will you pull that stick out of your ass? You're making a big deal out of nothing,"

"How can I even have it when the stick's up your ass at the moment? And it is a big deal, he confessed to me last night,"

"He was drunk; you can't possibly take it seriously,"

The older brother growled before lunging at the younger, pinning him to the floor in front of the couch that was now Matthew's bed. "That may be, but you weren't the one who got molested last night by some drunkard!"

"Get off," Matthew struggled beneath him, but couldn't push Alfred's body away.

"No, you need to hear me out Mattie: I can't keep this up any longer and last night I could've gotten raped!" he hissed into the other's ear.

"How can that be? If anything, you could've raped him…I mean just look at you!" Matthew glared up at his brother.

"You're missing the point – this little soiree-"

"What is going on in here?" Arthur bursted through the door when he heard yelling coming from the other side, only to see that Alfred was on top of Matthew.

"Mr. Kirkland?"

"Crap…" Alfred swore and feigned another sleep attack, falling on top of the photographer.

"Alfred? What's wrong with you? Get off me!" Matthew kicked against the heavy body.

"What do you think you're doing? Help me get him on the couch," the landlord immediately ordered, trying to hoist the unmoving blond onto the furniture.

"Alfred…?" his voice was beginning to lace with worry. He stood up from where he was on the floor and saw that the Englishman was already trying to drag his brother over to the beige couch.

When Arthur noticed that Matthew was just gawking at Alfred, he snapped "Why are you just standing there? He's sleeping,"

"Sleeping?" Matthew eyed the motionless blond and immediately saw the smirk he had on his sleeping face.

_Tricky monkey…_

"It's alright, just let him lay where he is right now. He'll wake up in a few minutes," the photographer tried to sound polite, kicking the limp body.

Alfred recoiled slightly from the action, but kept his eyes closed, his smirk turning into a frown.

Witnessing the abuse, the landlord quickly pulled Alfred closer to him, embracing him tightly like a mother would to protect her child. "Are you daft? Is this what you do to someone who has narcolepsy?"

Although he was "asleep", Alfred was listening in to the whole conversation and supported Arthur by nuzzling into his chest, smiling.

_That's right Mattie, you're so mean!_

"So cute…" he heard the landlord mutter under his breath.

Matthew bit his bottom lip in frustration, playing the "bad guy" in this little drama scene. "…Sorry…I uh, I get irritated sometimes by his sudden sleep attacks," he bowed his head slightly in apology.

"It's not his fault," Arthur said softly, running his hand lovingly through Alfred's blond hair.

"I know it's not, but it just strikes at the most unfortunate of times,"

At this, something clicked in Arthur's head and he looked up from Alfred's innocent face to Matthew's amethyst eyes. "Just what was it that you two were doing before I came in?"

_Doh…_both brothers thought at the same time.

"We were…uh…Alfred was helping me out with my acting," Matthew started slowly, trying to hold his gaze. "You suggested that I should practice someplace outside of my bedroom right? So I thought the living room would have been better…"

"And just what was it that you were rehearsing for?" Arthur genuinely wanted to know what play required Alfred to pin his younger brother down to the floor like that.

Sensing that this was the perfect time for the hero to jump in, Alfred moved around in Arthur's arms to distract him and save Matthew the trouble of coming up with another lie. "Mm, Arthur, is that you?"

The Englishman immediately directed his attention to the awakened blond. "Oh Alfred, you woke up," Although his cheeks were tinged red, his hands still lazily hung around the taller blond's torso.

"Yup! How long was I out?"

"Only a couple of minutes," Matthew answered before Arthur could, walking up to his brother still on the ground. "Shame on you, just when Mr. Kirkland came to visit you,"

"It's not a problem, really," Arthur spoke up, but was silenced when his face was pressed up against Alfred's chest, unable to see anything behind him...or in front of him for that matter.

"I'm so sorry Arthur!" Alfred sounded sad, but upon looking up at his brother he mouthed the words "You owe me big time!" accompanied by a sly wink.

Matthew scowled for a good two seconds, but then his mouth twitched into a small smile when he realized that their little crisis was averted.

"So, was there something you wanted to talk to me about? Or did you just want to see me?" Alfred grinned down towards Arthur, still red in the face.

"I…wanted to apologize for last night…" Arthur dropped his gaze. "I fear that I might have done something I shouldn't have,"

Alfred glowered for only a second. "Do you remember what you did that may have been offensive?"

"Not really, I remembered we went to a restaurant and that I got tipsy…"

_You were smashed!_ Alfred wanted to clarify, but encouraged the man to continue with his false memories.

"And everything else is muddled. When I woke up this morning, I found myself blindfolded and tied to my sofa with the fire hose from the hallway…it must have been really bad, and I want to apologize for all of it,"

"What happened?" Matthew eyed Alfred inquisitively, knowing that it was his older brother who probably did it.

Alfred chuckled nervously while scratching the back of his head. He then hoisted Arthur off his lap and led him to sit on the couch. "Honestly, I had a great time! There's no need to apologize, Arthur…as for that last part of the story, what did happen? I only drove you back to your apartment and opened the door for you,"

"Maybe it was the other tenants who did that to you," Matthew helpfully offered.

"Yeah, after I left the third floor, I could have sworn I heard a lot of noise up there…but I'm sure they did that to make sure you didn't hurt yourself; you were awfully drunk," Alfred took advantage of Arthur's amnesia to distort the story a little to preserve his innocence. "Are you alright though?"

Again, the landlord blushed out of embarrassment for not being able to hold his liquor and admitted "I still have a slight hangover, and my back hurts for some reason,"

_Maybe I shouldn't have judo flipped him so hard like that…_

_What did you do to him, Alfred?_

"Oh no!" Alfred gasped dramatically. "Do you want me to massage your back for you?" His right hand snaked up the sandy blond's back, brushing his fingertips playfully along the material of his dress shirt.

As much as Arthur would have loved to say yes, he saw Matthew smiling (no, smirking?) in the corner of his eye and he composed himself before politely declining the offer. "N-no, it's quite alright…maybe some other time," he whispered the last part out.

"If that is what you wish," Alfred said smoothly, letting his arm drop and instead grabbed one of Arthur's hands to kiss the middle knuckle.

"Ah, yes…well, I should be heading back to my apartment and cleaning up the mess," Arthur slowly and reluctantly retracted his hand from Alfred's grasp, staring into sapphire eyes before slipping into the hallway and out of sight.

Once Matthew closed the front door (making sure his landlord wasn't lurking around), he went up to Alfred and high-fived him before sitting next to the blond. "You're being awfully generous with the physical contact," he observed.

"Heh, I find it cute to embarrass him in front of you like that, and it gets the job done,"

"…So are you still just playing around with him?" Matthew asked seriously, looking into his brother's eyes.

The older adjusted the glasses on his face before answering. "Yeah…it's not right isn't it?"

Matthew shook his head slowly. "No…but he looks so happy around you…I can't imagine how he'll react once you tell him the truth,"

"He doesn't have to know the truth," Alfred said suddenly. When his younger brother raised an eyebrow he explained "Since I gradually got into the mess, I can backtrack and be less affectionate towards him little by little so that when I ultimately break up with him, it'll be obvious and not as painful."

"That sounds like a long process, can this all be done before you go back to Harvard?"

The thought never crossed Alfred's mind. "…No…but I'll do what I can before I have to go. Afterwards, because I'll lose contact with him, he'll learn to move on,"

"I really hope so," Matthew muttered and added "Wow, for once your plan sounds like it might work,"

"Oh shush up!" The taller blond lightly punched the other on the arm and was about to get up when another question made him think.

"But what will happen to my rent?"

"I suggest you find that second job as an actor soon," he joked.

"You know I'm not cut out for that," the younger pouted. "I'm still trying to find one, but what if I don't have a second job in time and Arthur kicks me out?"

"...There's nothing I can do, Mattie…" Alfred shrugged solemnly.

"…Blackmail…" Matthew threw the word out after a minute of silence.

"What?"

"To assure that I get to keep my apartment after you leave, blackmailing him may be the only way,"

"But Matt-"

"Think of it as a parting gift for your dear younger brother," Matthew persisted. "You've been in his apartment a couple of times now right? Surely there must be something that he's hiding and doesn't want found out,"

"It's not ethical!"

"The fact that you agreed to 'pretend date' him is bad enough…why not sink lower? Besides, if this works out, it'll resolve everything: you won't have to keep going out with him and I get to keep the apartment,"

Alfred didn't know what to say at the moment, his mouth agape at how desperate his brother was being. Yet...he was just as desperate to get out of this situation...and despicable enough to undertake the task. Under his breath he kept saying "It's not right," but a small part of him wanted to go through with it and end the shenanigan. "You tricky monkey…" he finally conceded.

"It must run in the family eh," Matthew shot back, smirking slightly in order to conceal his own guilt.

"Alright, after midnight, we'll strike!" Alfred declared boldly.

"'We'?"

"What? You thought I was gonna do it by myself? If anything, you'll be my accomplice! Don't worry, we make a great duo don't we?" Alfred tried to sound optimistic about the idea.

The younger couldn't help but smile at the notion. "Once you think about it…yeah, we do."

"Oh, and do both of us a favor and get a padlock for the door; the guy lets himself in as if he lives here," the older insisted.

X.X.X.X

"Here, you'll be needing this," Alfred carelessly tossed the camera Matthew used for work in his direction.

"W-wait! You know your way around Arthur's apartment better than I do. So wouldn't it make more sense if you had the camera with you to take pictures?" Matthew said while fumbling around with the gadget to make sure it wasn't damaged.

"Excuse you, but who's the photographer around here?"

"…Fine…but you're in charge of breaking us in,"

"Not a problem!" Alfred winked, pulling out a ring of keys.

"What-How?" Matthew gawked at the thing his brother was dangling in the air.

"Arthur was nice enough to give me spare keys to his apartment," the older explained. "In case I wanted to stay there instead of this pigsty," he joked at the affronted photographer. "Anyways, this'll make our job easier, so let's go!" He pumped his fist into the air enthusiastically, forgetting for a moment that what he was doing was technically illegal. But then again, he was sure Arthur wouldn't mind at all if he broke into his apartment.

The two made their way up the stairs and onto the third floor, treading carefully and softly in the hallway as to not warn their neighbor of their arrival. When they reached the landlord's apartment, Alfred took out the ring of keys and began trying each one out until he heard a click on the other side and pushed the door slowly open.

As expected, all the lights were out and no one was in the living room.

"Matt, you got the flashlight?"

"Right here," Matthew whispered back, pulling it out of his backpack and handing it over.

The older leading the way, the brothers headed deeper into the apartment, leaving the front door open in case they had to make a quick escape. Soundlessly the two split up: Matthew inspecting the kitchen while Alfred took the living room.

To the taller blond's surprise, everything was tidied up, the fire hose from last night nowhere to be seen and the broken china swept up and disposed of.

_Hmmm, where could he be hiding that embroidery?_

"Hey Matt, found any dirt yet?" Alfred whispered quietly toward the kitchen area.

"Does having an illegal amount of tea in the cupboards count? Because it looks like that's all he needs to live,"

Alfred giggled at the remark. "Hey, this is for you bro; you be the judge and take a picture of that if you want,"

Matthew thought about it for a good second before shaking his head in the dark. "What about your end?"

"Nothing…" Alfred said dejectedly, running a hand along the book shelf. "Some old people books and mag-Hey, isn't this the company you work for?"

The younger brother strode over to Alfred's side as the older shown his flashlight over the front cover. "Eh? It is, this is our latest issue," Matthew genuinely sounded surprised. In his state of shock he didn't notice that Alfred yanked the camera out of his hands and took a picture. "What are you doing?"

Alfred had to stifle his laughter to answer properly. "Oh my god, who reads this stuff? That in itself is something to be embarrassed over,"

"Oh will you shut up?" Matthew was getting mildly irritated by his brother's childish behavior. "This isn't exactly the type of blackmail I was looking for,"

"But there's nothing else here,"

"We haven't checked the bedroom yet," both blonds looked toward the closed door that was Arthur's bedroom. Matthew walked up to it and gently tried to turn the doorknob. "It's locked."

Bashfully, Alfred presented a single key.

"Wha-"

"Don't ask." The older cut Matthew off and gave the photographer back his camera as he went up to the door and slid the small key into the lock hole. It fitted perfectly, and with a turn Alfred pushed the door open to reveal a sleeping Arthur in his bed. "Let's make this quick," he said in an even quieter tone.

Matthew nodded his head and the duo was once again split up to cover more ground. They turned off their flashlights and tiptoed to their respective areas in the bedroom.

Unaware of the brothers' presence, Arthur continued to sleep soundly.

Rummaging through the small shelf in the corner, Matthew finally found what he was looking for. "Aha!" he piped up just loud enough to get Alfred's attention.

"Whatcha find?" Alfred stopped what he was doing near the walk-in closet and turned his attention to his brother's dark figure. When no reply came, he asked "Hey, you listening?"

"…You don't want to know…"

"Of course I do, it must be good if-" Alfred stopped himself when he saw what was in Matthew's hands.

An open journal with various pieces of paper stuck in it all had his name on it. Even with the limited lighting in the room, the American could tell that all the journal entries concerned him in one way or another; whether it was about him having a chat with the landlord or just Arthur missing him and wanting to see him. When Alfred pulled out the loose leaflets, he saw that they were love letters or poems dedicated to him.

"Just hurry up and take pictures of these," Alfred ordered, cramming the parchment back into the journal and into Matthew's awaiting hands.

"Hey, who's the photographer around here? Give me a moment to change the aperture; it's too dark and I don't want to use flash."

"Yeah whatever," Alfred went back to his side of the room, and although Matthew couldn't see his face, he knew that his cheeks were burning from embarrassment.

After a few minutes of silence, interrupted only by the clicks of the camera shutter, Matthew jolted when he heard something clatter followed by cussing.

"Holy fu-" Alfred slapped a hand over his own mouth to cut off his swearing and immediately got to work putting back what he just found in the back of the closet.

"What? What is it?" Matthew put the journal back on its shelf and rushed over to his brother's side to see what he was trying to hide.

"Something unspeakably horrid," Alfred said breathlessly, face remaining flushed.

"That's good, now let me see," Matthew moved past his brother and finally got a look at the awesome blackmail material. "Alfred, this is gold!" Matthew teared up at the sight and raised his camera.

"Ugh quit that Mattie, this is…" for once Alfred was at a loss for words. He forcefully lowered his brother's camera and tossed the blackmail back inside the closet. "Dude…"

"You have to let me get a few shots of that," The photographer-turned-paparazzi persisted and tried to fetch the items when a hand stopped him. "But Al-"

"Who's there?" A third voice stunned the duo to silence as they turned their attention to the figure rising from his bed.

"Shit!" Alfred cursed under his breath and kicked the closet door closed, pushing Matthew down flat on his stomach as he rose from his crouched position. "Get going!" was the last thing he hissed at his brother before averting his attention to the now awakened landlord.

Matthew nodded his understanding, packed up his camera, and began crawling toward the still-open bedroom door.

Taking immediate action, Alfred jumped onto Arthur's bed and pinned the man down before he got to see anything. "Calm down Arthur, it's only me,"

"Alfred?" By the tone in his voice, the American could tell the landlord was surprised to see him. "What are you-"

To keep him distracted, Alfred began nuzzling the sandy blond's neck, a hand reaching out to caress the other's cheek. "I wanted to see you, Arthur," The words were bitter in his mouth, since the landlord was the last person he wanted to see at the moment after discovering some of his secrets.

"How did you…at this time-ah!"

Alfred smirked as the person beneath him shuddered from his little bite. Pulling himself away from the crook of his neck, he answered "I used that spare key you gave me to let myself in," When the Englishman looked away from him, Alfred cupped his cheeks with both hands and forced him to gaze into sapphire eyes. "It has always been your plan for me to use it like this right?"

_I can't let Arthur see Matthew _

"N-no…I…" wide emerald orbs peered into half-lidded blue ones.

Alfred leaned in close to Arthur's ear. "Are you saying you don't want me here?" he purred and flicked the landlord's earlobe with his tongue.

"You're…not being fair," Arthur whined, but hardly resisted the American's ministrations.

Alfred didn't say much, his tongue languidly running down the man's neck and nipping at the pale skin. He strained his ears to bypass Arthur's moaning and hear the click of the front door – the sign that Matthew made it out of the apartment safely. When the heavenly sound finally reached his ears, Alfred stopped what he was doing, his mission accomplished. He was about to haul himself off the Englishman and make up some excuse to leave when he saw the other's face.

Arthur's face was flushed, mouth slightly agape and silently asking for more. Alfred could see his own reflection in those unfocused green eyes.

Something in the taller blond made him want to continue what he was doing, make the other man his. Whether it was the emotion called love or just lust, Arthur was right there…waiting...

Making sure that Arthur could see him lick his lips seductively, Alfred once again hovered over the landlord. "I want you." He proved his point by sucking on the skin of Arthur's neck hard enough to leave a hickey. "I want to hear you scream my name as I pound you into the mattress…"

"H-how vulgar…" Arthur managed to say before gasping as a hand snaked its way under his pajama and slid across his torso. "Are you drunk?"

Alfred pushed the shirt up far enough to fully expose the Englishman's chest before replying lamely "Only intoxicated by you." He then lowered himself to lap at the heated flesh.

Already feeling lightheaded from the touches and now the tongue dancing across his stomach, Arthur only moaned and arched his back for more contact. For in that moment he couldn't form a coherent thought, only aware that this wasn't a dream. He also couldn't believe that it was Alfred who was doing this to him, the realization making him blush an even darker shade of red. Arthur soon seized all forms of resistance and turned his head left and right in the pillow as his body writhed in pleasure.

The blond on top didn't even look up from his work as he went lower, making sure that his hands were occupied playing with the other man's nipples.

Everything else was a drunken haze.

* * *

**End of scene fade to black** -shot a million times-

**Photography 101:** Aperture - Basically it's the system that allows how much light enters through the lens of the camera and is measured by f-stops. A higher f-stop (smaller aperture) allows less light while a lower f-stop (larger aperture) allows more light in, ideal for darker places.

**Endnotes:** I'm sorry, but I'm keeping this rated T. Besides...I'm not good at writing lemons anyways...and too lazy lol

Looks like someone is cracking under the pressure...


	8. Deceiver of Hearts

**Warnings:** Implied and mentioned sex. And just...read with caution...please...

* * *

_What a nice bed…wish I had one like this back at the dorm…or at Matt's place…wait, what?_

Alfred popped open his eyes with a start, his random dreamlike thought suddenly turning into a nightmare. He looked around the room to find that it indeed wasn't his dorm nor Matthew's bedroom.

It was Arthur's.

_Oh my god, what am I doing here?_

His question was immediately answered when he finally felt the presence of another in the bed. Alfred didn't dare turn around to look at the Englishman, keeping his back facing him while looking straight ahead.

_Did I really…?_

The events from last night slowly drifted into his mind, replaying the scenario. He was only here for some dirt, but somehow landed in Arthur's bed instead and got carried away. The blond remembered trying to stop himself and pretending to have another sleep attack before things got serious but couldn't. Was it because he wanted to finish what he started? To not disappoint Arthur? Or was he desperately trying to bring about some sort of feeling towards the landlord?

The American simply didn't know, but it all boiled down to the facts: because of the spur of the moment, he couldn't rein in his urges in time.

It wasn't entirely his fault though. Arthur looked like he enjoyed it as much as Alfred if not even more so.

Alfred frowned, hoping that sex was indeed all Arthur wanted out of him and now that his desire was granted, he can cut off their relationship with ease.

_I have to get outta here!_

When no movement came from the other end of the bed, the taller blond shifted carefully under the sheets closer to the edge.

_I can't be here right now…_

He was about to swing his legs over when the blanket moved on its own and a soft grunt was heard to his right.

"Mmm, Alfred…you're awake?" Arthur murmured before moving closer to the stiffened blond next to him to cuddle.

The contact made Alfred wince. All of this felt wrong. The spacious bedroom suddenly became stifling and cramped, the warm bed as cold as a sheet of ice. Arthur's gentle words were venomous hisses in his ears while his touch felt like daggers slicing across his skin.

"Y-yes…" he finally found his voice. "I'm so sorry for what happened last night," the words tumbled out of his mouth. Out of all the things he told the Englishman, this was the most honest statement he has said to him. Alfred truly regretted what he had done, and now he doesn't know how to get out of the situation.

"Don't be," the sandy blond reassured him and nuzzled into his chest.

Alfred bit his lower lip, making sure Arthur didn't see him do it. Taking a quick glance down at the bed, he grimaced when he saw the mess they made. He also noted that although he was still fully dressed in his t-shirt and jeans, Arthur wasn't.

_Shit…it really wasn't just a dream…_

When an idea to leave finally came to mind, he gently pushed the Englishman away at arm's length to say "I completely forgot! I have a meeting to tend to early this morning, and I won't be back for a couple of days,"

Arthur looked up from his comfortable spot between Alfred's arms to pout at him. But before he could get a syllable out the American continued.

"The announcement was sudden, I wanted to tell you about it sooner but it was very late and…I should get going now," He shot up from the bed and was about to flit out through the bedroom door when a hand wrapped around his wrist.

"Shouldn't you at least take a shower before you go?" Arthur's eyes were almost pleading for him to stay. He was sitting up on the bed now, still undressed, the blanket falling off his shoulders to reveal the extent of Alfred's damage. Bite marks were seen on the Englishman's neck, chest, lower back, and stomach. Alfred didn't even want to look any lower for more that might have been there.

Arthur leaned in for a kiss on the lips but never received one as Alfred quickly pulled back. Seeing the disappointed and almost hurt look on the other blond's face, Alfred held back a frown before leaning over the bed to chastely kiss him on the forehead instead. "I'll take one in Matthew's apartment. It'll be more convenient since I have to start packing," he replied with a plastered, sad smile. Gently prying the fingers off his wrist, he gave another apologetic kiss on the palm of Arthur's hand before making his way to the door. "Again, I'm very sorry…please bear with it until I return."

X.X.X.X

The moment Matthew saw his brother trudge into his apartment, he could already tell that something was wrong. "Alfred…"

The older barely spared his younger brother a glance before dragging his feet across the floor towards the bathroom where he took a long shower. When he was done, he slumped onto the couch, staring blankly at the equally blank television screen. Matthew thought he was going to resume playing his video game when the blond muttered dismally "It's over…I fucked up…"

"How? The last time I saw you…" Matthew tried to gather his thoughts. "You distracted Arthur very effectively,"

"…" Alfred remained silent for a very long time before stating "I've had enough."

"What?"

"The deal's done," the taller blond sighed exasperatingly. "I can't keep pretending anymore…at least you got the pictures right?"

It was the photographer's turn to remain quiet now. He bit his bottom lip nervously, knowing that he shouldn't say what he was about to say; but Alfred needed to know the bitter truth. "No…" The baleful glare his brother sent him made his breath hitch and he quickly explained "T-the pictures were all too blurry…you can hardly tell what they are…" Matthew bowed his head and focused his violet eyes on nothing but the wooden floorboards. "It was just too dark to capture anything properly,"

At this, the tension in the room finally snapped when Alfred animatedly jumped off the couch. "What! You're telling me that I did all that for NOTHING?"

The harsh tone made Matthew wince as he backed away from his raging brother. Still, he was confused as to why his failure unsettled the normally cheerful blond so much. "W-what happened last night? What did you do?"

The younger's questions apparently didn't register to Alfred, for he was already walking nervously back and forth in front of the sofa. "I made a mistake…" he mumbled more to himself than to Matthew. "This wasn't supposed to happen...It wasn't supposed to go that far..." When his dark sapphire eyes finally landed on the other blond in the room he demanded "You're going to help me sever it."

"What's 'it'?" he asked cautiously. "Your relationship?"

"Yes!" Alfred threw his hands up. "I've had enough of this fake relationship…I'm tired of lying…"

"But-"

"For God's sake, Matthew, I had sex with the man!" Alfred finally confessed, breathing heavily from pent up frustration.

"You what? Alfred…why-"

"I don't know okay! I just did…it was only physical intimacy though…" Alfred ran a hand roughly through his blond hair. "I don't love him."

"Al-"

Just then both brothers heard something clatter against the floor near the open front door.

Arthur was standing there, his arms dropping limp to his sides as the items he once held broke in front of him at the threshold of the apartment. It was apparent from his slightly wet hair that he just got out of the shower, donning a collared shirt with a sweater vest over it. His expression was unreadable.

"Arthur…"

The landlord was already running down the hall before Alfred could say anything more.

Not that he had anything in mind. Based on his reaction, he knew that the Brit heard everything. "Why didn't you get the padlock?" he hissed angrily.

Irritated that the other's frustration was being put on him, Matthew snapped "It takes time to go out and buy one you know!"

Alfred strode over to the spot Arthur had occupied seconds before, noticing that the sandy blond wanted to give something to him before he left. The glasses he left on Arthur's nightstand now laid cracked on the ground...he didn't even remember when he took them off in the first place. The neatly folded embroidery from before was now complete and spewed out of a small box tied with a ribbon. A single red rose had a small letter attached to it.

"_To my beloved Alfred,_

_Because you had to leave on such short notice, I wasn't able to give you a proper gift. I mean, I always wanted to give you this since we went to that restaurant as an apology gift…but…just have a safe trip you git! I wish I can accompany you, but that's childish thinking, so instead bring these with you as a reminder of me._

_Sincerely,_

_Arthur Kirkland"_

* * *

**Endnotes:** Sorry for the incredibly short chapter...but seeing as though this is the turning point in the story, I wanted it to focus only on that.


	9. The Cruelty of the Beast

**A/N:** Don't worry, this is not the end yet. It'll also get better...I promise? And again I'm terribly sorry for the short chapter. But because everything is falling apart so quickly...

**Warning:** This chapter is so bad you guys shouldn't even bother to read it...

* * *

It has been a couple of days since Arthur learned the harsh truth. And to neither of the brothers' surprise, he hasn't come back.

"I'm sorry…" Matthew bowed his head. "I shouldn't have asked you to do that for me…"

"It's okay," Alfred immediately accepted the apology. "I was stupid enough to agree to it…it's also my fault,"

Neither brother said anything for a while.

"So…what now?"

Matthew walked over to the living room table to grab an apartment catalog he ordered through the mail. "I'll start looking,"

Alfred tried to smile. "So we're gonna run away just like that? Sounds rather cowardly,"

"It has worked many times for you before right? Wasn't that why you left this state?" The younger quipped, but upon seeing the other's hurt expression he quickly added "I'm sorry...I didn't mean to bring that-"

"It never gets any easier ya know?" Alfred cut him off, looking out through the window near the kitchen. His expression was somber as he continued "They'll learn to live past the pain..."

"So...what are you going to do about…How will you..."

The older sighed heavily before saying "I'll think of something…you think we should just leave it at this without another word?"

"...I'm not one to advise you on what to do anymore," Matthew shook his head. "But if you want my honest opinion, I think you should at least apologize."

_And I should too..._he thought to himself.

"I guess so…" Alfred responded flatly, poking at his half eaten pancakes with his fork.

The two remained speechless for the rest of their lunchtime, wallowing in their own guilt.

X.X.X.X

Alfred slowly trudged up the stairs to the dreaded third floor and eventually made it in front of his brother's landlord's apartment. He took a deep breath to muster whatever wit and courage he had left and with the spare key slowly turned the doorknob, making sure that the person on the other side heard him enter.

"Welcome back, whore. How was your 'trip'?" Arthur greeted the American who was still standing outside.

Alfred winced at the word but took the insult.

_Ouch…_

Peering into the living room from a safe distance, he noticed that Arthur wasn't in tears – casually having some tea while staring at the television across from him even though it wasn't turned on. The calm expression on his face perturbed him. "The jig is up."

"So it seems."

There was tension in the air, but Alfred decided to brush it off and commented "You're taking this very well; I'm glad."

Arthur gave him a sideward glance. "Hurry up and state your business; the sight of you sickens me," he spat.

"Time's changed huh? Because not so long ago you were thrilled to see me," Alfred folded his arms together and tentatively crossed the threshold. "Oh, how love can quickly change to hate eh? Makes me wonder if you actually loved me at all from the beginning," he mused aloud.

This earned him a glare from the other, but the landlord remained where he was on the couch.

"A-anyways, I'm only here to give you back your keys,"

"…"

Alfred may only be keeping up a collected front, but on the inside he was anxious to get the hell out of there. The fact that everything about this scenario was off (the neat living room and placid person who just got deceived) made him wonder if Arthur was actually a psychotic killer who murdered his boyfriends whenever they dumped him.

After he thought it was safe, he cautiously made his way into the living room, going into the kitchen area to return the keys Arthur had given him. The whole time he kept an eye on the Englishman – he felt like he was in a cage with a lion! And during the whole journey from front door to kitchen, nothing was exchanged between the two.

So it made the blond jump out of his skin when Arthur suddenly said "The world is cruel, isn't it?" When the American said nothing, only stared at him with wide blue eyes he continued "I told you everything about myself, only to really know nothing about you in return…only false affection." Arthur bit his bottom lip at the last part, tightening his grip around the teacup.

Alfred finally said what he came here to say. "I'm sorry…I know it's too late to say that and by doing so won't change a single thing. And I'm not going to ask you for your forgiveness, for what I did is undeserving of that. But I just wanted you to know that…I…didn't do it for fun…" he finished lamely.

"Then _why_?" Arthur growled, his patience wearing thin. He didn't want to see Alfred right now; the person who ripped his heart right out of his chest. And although the answer he will get from the man might very well be more lies, he needed some sort of reply; because the question gnawed at him ever since that day - keeping him awake at night and leaving him in shambles by day.

Once Alfred was near the front door again, he faced the landlord who was leering at him from his seat. "This whole time I've been telling you nothing but lies; I think it's time you knew the whole truth – I did it for my brother's sake."

"How is-"

"Everything was planned out from the beginning." Alfred continued monotonously. He gazed at Arthur evenly for his reaction as he explained "From the day I first came here, Matthew's rent was due. He couldn't pay it because of you,"

The landlord gawked at the American, the pieces already falling into place.

"I knew that you liked me the first time you saw me. The plan was simple: seduce you into lowering my brother's rent. It worked rather well, if I do say so myself," When the other blond continued to remain speechless, he went on. "I had hoped that after the job was done, I would break up with you slowly and easily…that part failed obviously."

"Then…" the Englishman slammed the teacup back onto its saucer, breaking both of them. "When you…" He didn't have the breath to finish his conclusion, his body shaking with anger.

Alfred winced at the broken china, but offered "It was a fair tradeoff wasn't it?"

Arthur did nothing but glared daggers at him.

Calmly he replied to Arthur's silent question. "We were both just using each other weren't we? I gave you what you wanted: sex, and in return you gave me what I wanted: a lower rent."

"…Was that what you were thinking?" Arthur hissed after a few moments of silence passed between the two of them.

Alfred dared to look straight into those blazing emerald eyes before curtly answering. "Yes."

A piece of the saucer immediately flew after the response, shattering behind the American into even smaller pieces. The taller blond didn't even bother to run his thumb over the cut below his right eye, letting the blood flow down his cheek.

"After all that you've said, you still have the gall to stand there!" the sandy blond roared.

"I'm merely answering your questions and telling you the truth," Alfred said flatly. "It's what you wanted, so why are you getting so upset? You saw it coming didn't you?" He had to duck his head to avoid another shard of saucer thrown at him. He then plastered on a smirk. "Oh, so now you're trying to kill me?"

"Shut up you whore!"

"Heh…" the taller blond couldn't help but chuckle. "Actually, I'm what you'd call an 'escort'."

"Get out!"

"No." Alfred leaned against the front door and crossed his arms casually. "There's still one more thing I'd like to admit."

"I don't want to hear it!" The Englishman covered his ears with his hands and shook his head vehemently. It was a wonder how he didn't stand up yet to remove the American himself.

"Too bad," Alfred smiled wickedly. "This whole ordeal was your fault – you did this to yourself."

"What! You dare accuse me!" By now the calm façade Arthur tried so hard to keep up crumbled and raw anger took its place.

"Yes, I blame you for this situation. And it's not because you walked into my conversation with Matthew; none of this would have happened if you simply didn't raise the rent."

"It's my job!"

"It doesn't have to be. You can always lower it as well." Alfred laughed bitterly. "Shame on you, only lowering Matthew's rent when I got here."

"You! It was because of you…!" Arthur gripped a piece of the teacup he intended to throw at Alfred so hard that it bit into his own skin instead.

The blond near the door only sneered at the remark. "All the more to be shameful – being tricked by a whore."

The gentleman finally snapped, throwing the bloodied china in Alfred's direction but missing entirely. "Get out of my sight!" he screamed in rage. "I fucking hate you! I never want to see you again!" He finally got up from the couch, quickly grabbing the final shard on the table to use as a makeshift dagger.

Alfred continued to smile.

_That's right, hate me…hate my guts. It'll be less painful that way, because to hate is so much easier to do than love_

Arthur approached the blond with shaky but determined steps, his eyes never veering from the man's sickeningly sweet face that now had a crimson rivulet running down one of its sides.

_It wasn't your fault...I'm sorry...I only hope that you will be able to forget about me_

He bowed slightly toward the raging landlord. "If that is what you wish. Matthew and I will be moving out in a couple of days so that you'll never have to see our faces again."

The news seemed to have shocked the sandy blond, for he stopped dead in his tracks.

Using the moment to open the front door and excuse himself, Alfred shot back over his shoulder "Goodbye, Arthur Kirkland."


	10. The Last Escort

"Do you have any regrets?"

"Only the fact that I broke a man's heart."

"Kind as always, never change in that sense, Al."

Alfred chuckled softly at the compliment.

"Do you think Arthur's the suicidal type? Or what happens if he tries to kill you now?" Matthew began to panic from his own pessimistic thoughts.

The older waved dismissively at his brother's worries. "Don't you be worrying about that, I made sure that I left him raging and cursing my name!" he gave the other a thumbs-up.

"What? But if he's not sulking, maybe he's plotting his revenge!" the younger squeaked.

"Hey, I'm still alive aren't I? Besides, once we leave this apartment, he'll never see us again. Then I'll go back to Massachusetts, and this will soon all be a funny memory," he tried to sound merry about the idea. Absentmindedly, he ran a finger across the healing scar beneath his eye.

Matthew looked at his brother pensively with amethyst eyes. "You purposefully made him hate you? That doesn't sound like the hero I know,"

Alfred's bright smile fell a little. "I just don't want Arthur to pity himself or anything like that. I want him to move on as quickly as possible. And real, true heroes are both loved and hated…you can't please everyone ya know? Or maybe I'm like an anti-hero!" he joked.

The photographer couldn't help but smile at his brother's optimistic attitude. His eyes then drifted to the living room table that still needed to be moved and caught sight of a box wrapped with a ribbon next to a withered rose. "You're keeping it?" he pointed at Alfred's gift.

The older took the box into his hand and lifted the top open to reveal the embroidery folded neatly inside. "Yeah, as a reminder of my sin…"

"Don't be so hard on yourself,"

"I know." Alfred said simply. "Anyways, I still have a week left before I have to go back, and I only have enough money for the both of us to stay at a hotel for about two nights. After that, you'll have to start paying…"

"Gee thanks," Matthew rolled his eyes, but was genuinely grateful for the financial aid. "So, what was the plan again?"

"Well, since we have to leave this place right now, while we're at the hotel I'll help you start looking at the apartments you marked in the catalog,"

"Sounds good, should I start calling for the moving truck to carry the furniture?" he motioned toward the old couch and packed boxes littering the living room floor.

"Yeah, it'll take them a while to get here so during that time you can help me check into a cheap hotel,"

"Okay."

Alfred turned to face his brother. "I promise you bro, once I graduate this summer, I'll find a job and make so much money that we can both own a house!"

Matthew smiled at his older sibling. "Speaking of jobs, I was able to find another one,"

"Really? That's great!" Alfred bear hugged the younger blond after hearing the good news. Such things were hard to come by these days.

"Y-Yeah, I got promoted to editor for the columns and get to keep my other job as a photographer in my company…although…I think I received it too late, seeing as though we're leaving this apartment either way,"

"Nah, it's never too late for something like that," Alfred released his brother from his death grip and swung his bomber jacket over his shoulder. "Now come on, we have a hotel to find!"

"Yes, sir!" Matthew saluted him but stiffened when an audible gasp escaped from the other near the front door. "M-Mr. Kirkland?"

"…"

Alfred was already backing away from the threshold. "Arthur…" he regarded the man standing at the entrance warily. The taller blond was specifically looking for any knives or guns the landlord may be hiding from him.

_Damn it! Who'd knew he'd actually come back? I was hoping we could leave with ease…_

"Don't worry sir, we were just leaving. As I've promised, I'll get out of your sight forever." He tried to read the landlord's intentions, but because his head was hung low, his face was hidden by his blond bangs hanging over emerald eyes.

Matthew silently observed the scene and was about to approach his brother when a small voice froze him in his place.

"I won't allow it…"

Sapphire eyes widened at what he thought he heard. "What-"

"I won't allow it!" Arthur said louder, lunging at the unsuspecting American.

"Alfred-!"

"Oof, it's okay Mattie, I'm fine," the older reassured him. "He's not armed," he moved to the side so that Matthew could see what has happened.

Arthur was only clutching onto the leather material of Alfred's jacket, hiding his face in his chest.

When he was sure it was safe to leave, the younger sibling made eye contact with his brother before quietly closing the door behind him.

_Sorry Alfred, but I think I'll only get in the way if I stayed…_

_Great…what do I do now…?_

"Arthur, get a hold of yourself," Alfred started, grabbing the man's shaking shoulders in order to push him away.

"I won't let you go!" The Englishman blurted out, and although only his forehead was pressed against him, Alfred could feel hot tears streaking down his white shirt.

The American was taken aback by the outburst. "B-But I thought you never wanted to see me again…Don't you despise me?"

"I do…but…" Arthur was shaking his head miserably.

"Then shouldn't you be hitting me or something?" Poor Alfred felt like he was living in a backwards country. He could really use a hamburger right now.

"What? No! I would never…" the landlord finally raised his head to look into bewildered and if not slightly irritated blue eyes. It was then that the wound near those clear orbs caught his attention. "Look at what you made me do!" He gingerly ran a thumb over the scar, which made Alfred wince uncomfortably, but he didn't pull away from the contact. "You made me hurt you…this is all your fault!"

_Damn it! Why do my awesome plans always have to backfire one way or another? Maybe it's just 'cause of him…_

"Yes, I know it is…and I'm sorry…" Alfred said awkwardly, trying to sit down on the couch while dragging a sobbing Englishman with him. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'll take my leave now," he was done making up polite excuses to leave the man. He just wanted out!

"No…stay with me…" Arthur continued to cling onto Alfred's arm desperately. "Please…don't go…"

"What's with you? Just a couple of days ago you hated my guts, and now you want me to stay?" The tone he accidentally let slip from his mouth must have been a bit too sharp, for the sandy blond noticeably flinched and retracted his hand. What confused the taller blond even further was the fact that he was blushing.

"I…" The next words snagged in his throat, and his tongue couldn't wrap themselves around them.

"Hmph." With one hand, Alfred grabbed and pinned both of Arthur's wrists above his head and to the sofa cushion. Once the shorter blond's back hit the couch as well he forced the other to look directly into icy blue eyes. "I already told you, dear Arthur, the jig is up. Or is it a good fuck you're looking for?" He said before attacking the Englishman's neck with his teeth and rolling his left nipple between his fingers through the fabric of his clothes.

When only gasps and moans met his ears, he went lower and pushed open the collar of Arthur's dress shirt to reveal the hickey still left from that night. He roughly licked the spot before biting down on it again, leaving a fresh red mark. After that was done, with a struggling Brit still beneath him, Alfred started licking up his throat, stopping to suck on the Adam's apple bobbing up and down according to the pitch of Arthur's mewling. A sadistic side of him wanted to bite that part as well, but he made sure to keep it in check and instead his mouth began wandering down to the collar bone.

"Ahn! Al…fred…st-stop…stop it!" Arthur finally found the strength to say the words and shake himself loose from the other's grip.

Alfred almost mechanically lifted himself up and smirked.

"H-How can you just go out and do that to someone?" he snapped between ragged breaths, face still flushed from the ministrations.

The American simply tilted his head to one side, genuinely confused by the question. "Wasn't that what you wanted?"

"It's not what I wanted,"

"…I see…" Dark sapphire eyes soon turned into bright bemused ones again as the blond tried to process the new information. "But I thought that…most guys only want casual sex…"

Emerald eyes widened as if offended. "I'm not like most of them!"

Alfred bit his bottom lip at what he had done. The true extent of the pain he had inflicted on the poor Englishman came crashing down on him. Sure he had known that the man was attached to him somehow…but he never would have guessed that it was anything beyond physical infatuation. That his "love" would quickly fade away after one night. Or at least, that was what he kept telling himself to lessen the guilt. But now, with a weeping landlord in front of him, it was painfully obvious what the man felt for him.

_I…I forgot how much of a hopeless romantic he is…oh Arthur, why can't you just be like the rest of them?_

Alfred sighed deeply before gathering the other blond in his arms for an apologetic hug. "I'm sorry," he whispered softly. "You shouldn't bother with me, I'm sure there's someone else out there worthy of your affection and kindness."

"No there isn't,"

"Yes there is." Alfred shot back. "Arthur, I used, abused, and abandoned you! I broke your heart…how can you even bear to look at me? Much less want me by your side?"

The Englishman did nothing but shake his head mutely.

_Man, he can be so cute at times!_

Gently, Alfred lifted Arthur's chin so that green eyes met with blue ones once again. "Is this what love does to a person?"

With whatever dignity he had left, the sandy blond wiped away the last of his tears and meekly nodded.

Again, the American sighed exasperatingly. "The problem is…I have to leave, whether you want me to or not…"

"Is it because the rent is still too high?" he asked suddenly. "I…I can lower it again if you want…I'll even let you stay in your own apartment free of charge…"

Alfred lightly ruffled his hair before answering "The money and rent are not the problem, you see…I forgot to tell you that I lied about my occupation…I'm only a college student at Harvard…"

"But…"

"Now do you see? I have to go back…Our relationship was never meant to be…it was destined to fail,"

"But that means we had one right? Can't we fix it? I can change I swear! Just give me a second chance," Arthur implored.

"Wait, what?"

_The guy twisted my words!_

"We uh…"

_Were never in a relationship to begin with…and aren't I supposed to be the one asking for a second chance?_

"You're missing the point. I don't think a long distance relationship will work out…besides…why do you care so much for me? What about your previous lovers?" None of this was planned; the whole conversation was spiraling out of control. Alfred was running out of ideas.

Arthur grew quiet from the question. "What lovers?" he asked bitterly. "After one night, I don't even see them the morning after…" the Englishman then whipped his head up toward Alfred. "But you were different, you stayed with me…"

_That's because I wasn't able to leave in time before you woke up…_

"Surely that means something, doesn't it?"

"But you won't like the real me!" Alfred tried desperately, his mind scattered right about now. A guy can only take so much before he ran out of excuses.

"How would you know that?" Arthur challenged with hope in his voice.

Alfred was at wit's end. Still, the way the sandy blond's eyes twinkled with a mixture of anticipation and pleading made his lips twitch upward.

_Maybe this is my chance to repent for what I did to him…_

Pulling the other man onto his lap in an act of genuine affection, he looked Arthur in the eyes and said "Alright…I'll give it a shot. And I promise that this time I'll actually try – no more acting." The smile he received from the shorter blond was priceless, but before he started giving the landlord false hope he added "But I warn you, you'll want me outta your life after the first day,"

Arthur only smirked playfully at the remark. "Try me."

"Then I guess I'll reintroduce myself: I'm Alfred Jones, I actually don't have narcolepsy, I hate tea with a passion, love to eat burgers and play video games, and proud to be graduating from Harvard University!"

"I'm Arthur Kirkland, your brother's landlord. I enjoy cooking and embroidery as well as having a cup of tea every afternoon…and…I love you…" The last part was rushed before the Englishman ducked his head into the safety of Alfred's broad chest.

Pleasantly surprised, the American loosely hugged him while nuzzling into his sandy blond hair.

He may not exactly feel the same way toward Arthur now…and it was all just out of pity at the moment, but Alfred had a strong hunch that along the way it'll be something much more significant. Maybe, just maybe, he'll know what love truly is, and in turn return the other's feelings.

* * *

**Huge-ass Endnotes:** Omg what have I created? Blasphemy...that's what. Man, this was all ass-backwards wasn't it? Now I definitely know I should be thrown into the pit of Tartarus...OTL Oh, and please forgive me for this long endnote...

For those who read this from start to finish, I applaud and bow down to you for your patience and support. And thank you so much to those who alerted, faved, and reviewed! So much love goes out to those who reviewed every chapter or close to that (you know who you are)~ I AM NOT WORTHY! OTL

For the most part this fic is complete; but "where one story ends, another begins". What happens beyond this point between Alfred and Arthur is up to your imagination.

And let me just say that if I disappointed any of you in any way, please accept my apologies -bows-

I'm very, very sorry if the ending made no sense at all or was not to your satisfactory, but even at the end I just really couldn't have Alfred completely fall for Arthur just yet...I guess it's because to me it's more realistic to give it more time...-shot- (Yeah right, since when was this fic ever realistic?) Also, I personally didn't want this to end in tragedy; I don't think you fellow readers deserved that and especially Arthur. And since it initially started out as humorous, I wanted it to end in what can be called a humorous/kooky way. Ya know...to complete the cycle -shot- Now here's a question for all of you beloved readers: How would you have ended this story? I really want to know because my puny mind could only come up with this to save it from a bitter and sad ending. Once I think about it, this story could have been a lot darker...

**Q and A**

_Alfred why you no love Arthur! -rage- _

As mentioned above, Alfred just needs more time lol. The reason is because he's simply overwhelmed by Arthur (hell, he basically knows everything about him) and so it'll take a while for him to accept all his flaws as well as personality in addition to showing Arthur his true self and see how it plays out from there.

_How Arthur can still love someone like Alfred after all he did to him is beyond me..._

Same here...Maybe it's just because love conquers all~ -shot- Okay well, like I said before this was the only solution I could think of to give this story a "happy" ending. Alfred is rather heartless in this fic and so it's really only up to Arthur (lovestruck til the very end!) to try and save their "relationship", even if he's the one who got hurt (I probably lost points on the 'realism' scale for that, but who knows, maybe there are people like that out there). But I guess if you want a more in-depth explanation, here's one: In chapter 6 Arthur mentioned how all of his past relationships ended in the other dumping him without reason and was never seen again. Alfred was the only person who returned to apologize and even provided a reason as to why he did what he did (even though it was something Arthur didn't want to hear). Given those couple of days to think to himself, he figured that Alfred wasn't actually that cruel and was doing something selfless. There was also that tidbit in this last chapter about how Alfred stayed in bed with him. As for Alfred, he's never seen such persistence and logic in Arthur's action to come back to him. ^^'

_What...that's it? This fic was too short!_

I'm so terribly sorry, but I'm simply out of ideas...OTZ Plus, I'm thinking that watching Arthur get tricked for the longest time was either breaking your hearts or boring you so yeah...Authors who can go on and on with their stories are godly (unlike me) because seriously, that takes a lot of talent and creativity, something I lack. There was also the problem with time: Alfred was only on vacation, so it's a very small time frame to work with and resolve the issue; since once he leaves that apartment and flies back to Harvard, all hope would have been lost. Arthur had to work fast.

_What was in Arthur's closet?_

...Narnia...-slapped-

_WTF I've been swindeled falsdkj Where's the romance in all this?_

The author is very stupid and thought that one-sided love and fake flirting was considered "romance". I'm very sorry if I have mislead you, but there is so little I can do to make up for it:

1) I can apologize a thousand times over and beg for your forgiveness.

OR

2) I'll write a crappy but happy and sappy (rhyme c-c-combo!) epilogue in which they do end up together...somehow lol

The choice is yours. On another note, I read in a couple of reviews saying that they wanted to see Francis in the story somewhere. Because of the route the story accidently took on, I wasn't able to really find a spot for our beloved Frenchman anywhere, with him residing in France and all. But I really do want to incorporate him somehow and so I'll write an extra filler chapter in which he and other guests will make an appearance.

For those who aren't going to stick around I just want to thank you once again for spending your time reading this lame fic of mine. It means a lot to me. ^^

Any final burning questions you want to ask? Last comments you want to make? Please don't hesitate to drop a review and let me know~


	11. Extra: The Snake and the Frog

**A/N:** So, it would appear as though many of you want an epilogue...challenge accepted! You really shouldn't look forward to it though, because I'm horrible when it comes to writing happy endings...OTL In the meantime here's a filler-ish chapter~

This is what happens when I try to cram so many things into one chapter...a big mess OTL Anyways, this is just an extra and would have been placed somewhere after chapter 4. I'm sorry if it's junk...but I'm not really used to writing dialogue and what not when there are more than two people present (because then I confuse myself on who's talking) T_T

**Warnings:** Francis being himself, Alfred being a sneaky bastard, Arthur being the lovesick fool, and Matthew being the one behind all of this...just the usual in this fic~

* * *

It's been so long since Matthew had such a peaceful sleep. Sure, he's still sleeping on the couch due to his evil brother's tyranny, but for one night it was nothing but glorious dreams of hockey, the heavenly smell of pancakes, and the sweet sound of the smoke detector going off…

"What the hell? Alfred!" The photographer jolted up from the couch and instinctively sought out his older brother. He found him in the kitchen next to the source of the commotion.

"You haven't lived until you try one of my omelets!" The bright blond exclaimed, reaching for a heaping bowl of grated cheese. Grabbing a handful of it, he sprinkled it into the fuming frying pan. "BAM!"

"Turn it off!" The younger yelled over the incessant beeping of the smoke detector, his eyes already stinging from the smoke clouding the whole kitchen.

"No way! They're almost done,"

"They're burning!"

Alfred stared at his breakfast, the eggs brown and almost seared black around the edges. "Naw, they taste good like that!" He gave it one more thoughtful look before adding "But you're right, it's missing something…more cheese!" And proceeded to dump the whole bowl of cheddar into the frying pan, aggravating it further as it hissed and sizzled.

Giving up trying to stop his demented brother, Matthew instead made better use of himself and opened the window next to the kitchen to let some of the smoke escape. Once this was done, he finally turned off the smoke detector, lest he wanted the firefighters to come barging into his apartment. "I swear you're more trouble than you're worth," he complained aloud. It wasn't a good sign when he heard Alfred snicker.

"Oh really now?" The older brother finally turned off the stove, scraping his breakfast off the pan to set onto a dish. "May I remind you that you're-"

Both brothers heard someone knocking on the door. Speak of the devil…

Almost instinctively Alfred headed for the hills (in this case Matthew's bedroom) and locked the door as Matthew went over to the entrance, ready to greet a probably enraged landlord.

But instead of a grumpy stiff of an Englishman, a blond with wavy hair and stubble was in front of his doorway: Francis Bonnefoy.

"Francis?" Before he can say anything else, he was pulled into a hug by the newcomer.

"Mathieu! I'm so glad you haven't forgotten about yours truly," the blond laughed lightly, patting the other's head affectionately. He then eyed the scene behind the younger blond. "And, I take it you were in the middle of something?"

Still awed by what he saw before him, Matthew couldn't help but ask "But I thought you moved back to France? Why are you here?"

"Oh mon cher, I'm simply here on vacation; and of course I had to see how mon petite Mathieu was doing,"

"I'm doing well, thank you," the photographer smiled warmly before remembering something. Turning his head back into the living room he called out "Hey Al, it's okay, you can come out now!"

At first Alfred opened the bedroom door only a crack to make sure the coast was clear, but eventually stepped out of the room and to his brother's side when he realized the blond in front of Matthew wasn't Arthur.

"Alfred, this is Francis, my old landlord, he's come here from France," Matthew started the introductions.

Alfred extended his hand and smiled in good humor. "Nice you meet ya, Francis, I'm-"

"Alfred, oui? I've heard everything about you from Mathieu," The Frenchman was quick to respond, reaching out for Alfred's face and kissing him on both cheeks before the American could even finish introducing himself.

"It's okay Al, it's normal for him to do that," Matthew said quietly, placing a hand on his brother's shoulder. He then gave it a slight squeeze as a warning, seeing the clenched fists and hard expression the older donned. He looked like he was going to maul someone!

When the former landlord was finally done with Alfred's face, he relinquished his grip but kept him at arm's length. Looking at the taller blond from head to toe he added "My, you look so much more handsome than Mathieu described,"

"Why thank you, sir," Alfred replied coolly, giving the other a charming smile. He stepped back and casually shrugged the Frenchman's hands off him.

Matthew sighed with relief, glad that his brother could get along with his previous landlord, but upon turning to face Alfred, he saw a venomous glare sent his way from those cold, blue eyes.

_This was a trap! You're gonna pay for this Mattie…_

"So," Francis' voice broke the stare-down between the brothers. He addressed both of them, those cyan orbs lingering longer on Alfred's form. "Are you two going to be gracious hosts and-"

"No loitering in the hallways!"

The trio all turned their heads to the fourth blond storming towards their humble apartment. And from the scowl on his face, it was obvious to the brothers that he witnessed the kiss.

Matthew squared his jaw while Alfred did his best not to make it apparent that he was rolling his eyes, praying to the ceiling above.

_Great…_

"Oh, and who might you be?" the question was accompanied by an airy laugh.

"I can ask you the same question," the Englishman snapped before he caught up with them. But when he did he immediately clung to Alfred's right arm, glaring the Frenchman down.

"Moi? Why, I am the former landlord of this building, mon cher." Francis paused to observe the awkward couple. "And from what I can tell, you must be my replacement."

Arthur's eyes widened for only a second before those impressive eyebrows furrowed once more. "So you're the one I have to clean up after…"

As the two landlords argued over maintenance of the building, Alfred was forced to remain where he was, shackled by an Englishman around his arm. "Hey Matt," he whispered to the blond who was trying to pay attention to the conversation. "Could you fetch me my breakfast before it gets cold?"

"I don't think it matters if it's cold or not; it's inedible either way," Matthew commented before complying. He only had time to take two steps into the apartment before the bickering behind him ceased altogether.

"Are you hungry, Alfred? I can cook something for you if you want," It was amazing how easily Arthur could dismiss the other landlord when he "accidentally" heard Alfred talk to his brother.

"Huh? There's no need for you to go through the trouble, Arthur," Alfred answered lovingly but quickly. And because he had an audience this time, he needed to put more effort into the relationship, kissing the sandy blond on the forehead. This earned him a tighter grip on his arm and a blushing Brit.

However, the moment was killed too soon for Arthur's liking.

"Indeed mon cher, there's no need for that sort of trouble at all," Francis announced after looking at his elegant wristwatch. "In fact, why don't we all go out to eat an early lunch? It'll be my treat," he added that last part before the other landlord could have a say in it.

"Are you sure, Francis?" Matthew asked cautiously, taking note of how edgy Alfred was becoming.

"Of course mon ami! As they say: the more the merrier~" the Frenchman said suggestively, giving the couple a sly grin.

Arthur scowled but nonetheless responded "Very well, I guess it'll be quite rude of us not to accept your crude invitation."

"Magnifiques!" The blond clapped his hands together lightly and gave all of them the name of the restaurant and time.

"Well then, if that's all you have to say, I'll be getting ready," Arthur declared, ready to leave the hallway when it seemed like something struck him. Making sure that the other landlord was watching, he whirled around quickly and boldly pecked Alfred on his lips before shuffling to his apartment, too embarrassed to look back.

Francis only laughed that haughty laugh of his and turned his attention back to the duo. "I guess it's settled then! Until we meet again," And with that, he winked at them before walking down the hallway in the opposite direction, leaving the remaining blonds baffled as to what just happened.

X.X.X.X

"I ain't goin'!" Although he was already dressed up for the occasion, dress shirt and all, Alfred remained planted on the sofa.

"But you have to Al! Arthur and Francis are waiting for us," Matthew tried, putting on a pleading look.

"Nu-uh!" The older sibling insisted childishly, laying flat on his stomach on the couch, his face buried in one of its cushions.

"Don't be such a baby about it," Matthew decided to get more physical, grabbing his brother by the ankles and yanking him off the furniture.

But Alfred was quick to react, clutching to the arm of the sofa for dear life. "This wasn't part of the contract! What are you gonna make me do next? Date that Francis guy too?"

"Don't be ridiculous! He's only here on vacation, what's the point-" Just then the younger fell back, landing on his butt and holding onto fistfuls of pants.

The black slacks Alfred had on slipped right off him from the tug-of-war. Now in his boxers, the American made good use of the distraction and vaulted over the sofa to retreat into Matthew's bedroom once more, locking it this time.

The door was slammed in front of the photographer's face before he could step foot in it. "You can't lock me out of my own bedroom!" Matthew banged against the door with his fists. "AL!"

On the other side, Alfred was already planning his escape, opening the window next to "his" bed. He knew his brother had a key to his own bedroom, and that it'll only be a matter of time before he got in. So the best way to bust out of here was to jump through the window again. Hell, he did it once before, and he'll definitely survive the fall again. Turning his head back to the rattling door the blond proclaimed "You'll never take me alive, sucker!"

But before he even got one foot out of the window, what he saw made him stop dead in his tracks.

Arthur Kirkland, wearing his dark green sweater vest and black dress shoes, was right outside the building. More specifically, he was on the ground beneath the window Alfred just opened. "A-Alfred?"

Clad in only a dress shirt and boxers, awkward doesn't even begin to describe the situation.

"Ah…Arthur," Alfred tried to sound pleasantly surprised, resting his chin on the palm of his hand casually as he leaned against the window sill. "I'm sorry, were you waiting for me downstairs?"

_Are those binoculars behind your back?_

Aside from the blush on his face, the landlord looked almost relieved at the question thrown at him. "Yes I was…" he averted his eyes from the blond above. "If we don't hurry, we'll be late,"

Alfred gave him his most charming smile before answering "I'm so sorry I worried you, but please go on ahead without me. I'll go with Matthew and we'll meet up at the restaurant,"

"Are you sure?"

The American nodded his head quickly. "It pains me to keep you waiting, so I think it'll be best that way-"

"Get over here!" The small talk between the two gave Matthew enough time to sneak up on his brother and grab him from behind.

"Nooooooo!" Alfred struggled and screamed while he was restrained by the other's arms hooked beneath his.

Before Arthur could ask anymore questions, Alfred's figure disappeared from view as he was dragged back into the bedroom.

X.X.X.X

The first half of the car ride to the restaurant was filled with strained silence – Matthew refusing to acknowledge the fact that he was abusing his brother while Alfred was just irritated in general at how his supposed vacation turned out to be.

The younger kept an eye on his brother, making sure that the doors were locked in case the other tried to jump out of the car as a last ditch effort for freedom.

The atmosphere changed, however, when the radio played a song that perked Alfred right up. He started tapping his foot to the beat, a smile spreading across his face. "Just a small town girl, living in a lonely world, she took the midnight train going anywhere," The older brother then looked at the driver next to him, silently coaxing him to sing along.

Matthew gave him a look that asked "You've gotta be kidding me…" But when all he received was an expecting smile and a hand motioning him to cough something up, the younger didn't have much of a choice. Trying to remember the lyrics, he finally said "J-Just a city boy, born and raised in south Detroit,"

"He took the midnight train going anywhere," Alfred finished for him, an expression on his face that told him "You got it!"

"A singer in a smoky room," Feeling more confident now, the blond continued to sing as the song kept playing.

"The smell of wine and cheap perfume,"

For the rest of the trip, the brothers were a duet, taking turns with the lyrics until they reached the end, singing together "Don't stop believing…hold on to that feeling!"

As they rounded a corner and parked on the side of the street in front of their destination, Matthew's smile subsided as he addressed his brother. "You know what must be done, right?"

At this, Alfred simply placed a hand across his chest and calmly stared at the driver. "Yes, of course dear brother; I shall endeavor to keep Arthur Kirkland by my side at all costs and keep him happy to the best of my abilities." When his proclamation was done, he bowed his head slightly. But once the blond lifted his head up, it was obvious that he was smirking, those sapphire orbs twinkling deviously.

Matthew let out a breath he didn't even know he was holding. Alfred's voice sounded so soft…so earnest…And if it wasn't for the fact that Alfred was his brother, thus knowing him better, he could've fallen for his charms as well.

"C'mon, it would be rude to keep those two landlords waiting any longer," Alfred winked before closing the car door behind him.

Upon entry, the duo were taken to a table in the far back of the restaurant where two blonds were already seated.

_Oh…this can't be good…_

Indeed it wasn't. The duo didn't even have a chance to greet either landlord – the two of them far too busy arguing with each other. Although…it looked more like Arthur was the one yelling while Francis simply attempted to charm the man.

It was also obvious that Arthur wanted to be as far away from the former landlord as possible. So given that they were on a round table, he sat in the exact opposite seat of the other blond.

This left the brothers to fill in the gaps.

Alfred gave the Frenchman a disapproving look after sitting down next to him, Arthur at his right.

_Ya gotta try harder dude! How else are you gonna take Arthur off my hands…?_

But Francis took the look the wrong way and instead winked in his direction, smirking. "How nice of you to join us, mon cher,"

"Sorry we're late," Matthew chipped in, wanting to avert his former landlord's attention from Alfred.

"I really hope you can forgive me for my lateness, Arthur," The American pecked Arthur on the cheeks apologetically, much to the landlord's delight. He then glanced at Matthew, who gave him a curt nod of approval.

The ruffled look the sandy blond had on him quickly faded when Alfred appeared, grateful that he no longer had to be alone with that insufferable git of a landlord. "You should have come here sooner…" he mumbled.

The only one to catch the statement, Alfred quickly made amends by nuzzling into the other's neck, whispering sweet nothings. "I'm so sorry, did something awful happen?" he cooed into the landlord's ear.

Arthur only got one syllable out when a waitress came by to give them the menu.

While Francis flirted with the woman, Alfred reached for one and skimmed through it, wanting to order as soon as possible. He got to the second page in the menu when he felt someone kick him underneath the table.

Matthew was glaring at him from across the table. "Give Arthur your attention!" He could read his younger brother's lips, tilting his head toward the lonely-looking landlord.

Alfred gave him a scowl that said "Not now Matt! I can't escort someone on an empty stomach!" Another kick to his shin and the blond was on it.

_Slave driver…_

"Arthur," the American said gently, instantly getting the landlord's attention. "Have you eaten here before?"

The man lowered his menu, gazing into those soft, blue eyes. "Yes, I have. Why do you ask?"

"Perhaps you can help me pick out what to eat," Alfred scooted closer to Arthur, away from Francis so that they shared a menu. It really didn't matter what he ate at this point…as long as someone other than Arthur was cooking the food.

"O-Of course…" Noticing how close they were sitting next to each other, the landlord forced his eyes to stick to the menu instead of the blond beside him.

When everyone finally decided what they wanted, the waiting game started.

For Francis, it was another type of game altogether. The tension among the table was finally subsiding until he chose to sneak a hand around an unfortunate Alfred, groping him.

The blond stiffened at the contact but slowly turned to face him, shooting a venomous glare his way.

_What the hell dude? Can't you tell I'm already "taken"?_

Persistent as he was, the Frenchman concluded that because Alfred did nothing to stop his advance, it was okay to keep doing what he's doing.

Matthew, suddenly having this uneasy feeling, glanced to his right and swore under his breath. He could tell that Alfred's discomfort was caused by none other than his former landlord.

Arthur also caught wind of this when Alfred stopped smiling at him and spun his head around. He peered over the other's shoulder and what he saw made his blood boil. But it seemed that he didn't need to take any action other than compose himself.

"Pardon my French, but if you like the way your face is right now, I suggest you keep your hands to yourself." Alfred said with a toothy smile, batting away the perverse hand.

Francis took the statement as a hint and stopped…momentarily. After only a few minutes into a conversation with Matthew, that hand once again ventured beneath the table and managed to rub the other's knee. But before he could go any further or even retract his hand, an iron grip kept him in his place.

Alfred chuckled impishly as he grabbed the Frenchman's wrist and began bending those groping fingers back in an attempt to have them touch his arm.

Trying to save face, Francis said as coolly as possible "Mon cher, you're being a little rough,"

"Don't worry, it'll start feeling good _real_ soon," Alfred objected playfully, a satisfied expression on his face when he heard the other's fingers crack. "You'll still have your other hand to jack off with," he hissed sadistically.

Upon seeing the other landlord's panicked face and what Alfred was doing, Arthur couldn't help but smirk. He was so proud of his boyfriend.

"Alfred-" The startled voice of his younger brother didn't register as the American continued with his "handy" work.

Francis was about ready to jump out of his seat in an attempt to save his precious fingers when the waitress returned with their food.

Minding his manners, Alfred grudgingly released the pervert's hand, clearly disappointed by the intrusion. However, at the same time he was happy that the food has arrived.

"Merci beaucoup, madam," Francis thanked the woman for more than one reason, gingerly caressing his injured limb. He narrowed his eyes at the American, to which he responded with a smirk and wink.

The waitress gave the Frenchman a charming smile and turned to leave. "You're very welcome. Just call me if you need anything,"

"Here Alfred, would you like to try some of this fish?" Vying to get his beloved's attention, Arthur tore a piece of the battered fish with his fork and raised it up.

"Sure!" Alfred beamed at the offer and opened his mouth, allowing the other to feed him. He had to admit, it was very endearing of the landlord and after swallowing the bit of food, nuzzled his thanks. "As always, you have good taste."

Arthur stopped gawking at the fork Alfred had his mouth around just a second ago and focused on the blond's kind smile. Heat rose to his cheeks and he looked away for a moment. "Thank you," he replied softly, a small smile appearing on his face. There was no way that frog was a threat to him.

Looking on at the scene before him, Matthew sighed with relief, resting his chin in the palm of his hand.

_They look really convincing as a couple_

Just then he saw something in the corner of his eye and grimaced.

Francis' small pout turned into that all-familiar smirk as he eyed the man right across from him – his next target.

_What is he up to now…?_

Alfred, on the other hand, was completely unaware of what was to come until the man who was feeding him jumped from his seat, dropping the fork onto the porcelain plate.

_Uh…did I do something wrong?_

The landlord turned to Alfred, who had a confused look on his face, and noticed that the young man's arms were clearly not under the table.

Which only meant…

"You f-!" He seethed, glaring at the cocky man and was about to thrash him when a hand pulled him down.

_This is turning out to be quite the luncheon…_Alfred thought sardonically. With an angry Brit on his lap, he coiled his arms around Arthur's waist, resting his head on his shoulder. A leer from those icy blue eyes sent a clear message to the blond on his left: Stay away.

An amused smile crept onto the Frenchman's face before he casually turned to Matthew again and resumed their conversation.

"Alfred…" The landlord struggled, thoroughly embarrassed by what the American was doing…but at the same time enjoying it.

"I don't like him touching you…" Alfred growled, tightening his grip around the other while he glared daggers behind Francis' back.

_Plus, I don't want us to make a scene…it's exactly what he wants…_

When he turned his head slightly, he was met with a surprised face. "I'm sorry for the sudden outburst…Please don't be upset, Arthur," he continued sweetly, affectionately squeezing the sandy blond's clenched fists. "A frown doesn't suit you at all,"

Still on the taller blond's lap, it took Arthur a moment to realize what just happened. Alfred, the calm and polite gentleman, was being rather aggressive and overprotective. So now not only was he still mad at the frog and embarrassed by his own actions, but touched by his boyfriend's gesture and words. "I…I'm not upset," Arthur stated quietly. He felt himself relaxing against Alfred's chest.

"Alright then, so if I set you back down, promise me you won't maim anyone?" Alfred teased.

"But of course," Arthur replied cordially, returning the smile with a small one of his own. Although…he really didn't want to get off his new seat.

Alfred chuckled lightly before gingerly placing the man back into his chair, looking at him longingly.

Arthur noticed the stare and awkwardly picked up his fork again, trying to resume his meal.

_Now that that's dealt with…maybe I can finally finish my steak_

He sighed inwardly after checking up on the other two blonds on the table.

Fortunately, Matthew was doing a good job distracting the pervert and averting another crisis.

Alfred was just about to dig in again when he heard a familiar voice.

"What is this? You've come back and never told me, comrade? I'm hurt,"

All forms of conversation at the table ceased upon the arrival of the newcomer.

"Ivan…" The American said icily, his eyes narrowing at the tall Russian standing next to him.

_I wanna die, I wanna die, I wanna die!_

"Ah, so you remember me, I'm flattered."

"Excuse me," Arthur spoke up, already inspecting the intruder. "But exactly who might you be?"

The intruder had an amused look on his face as he answered "Oh how rude of me. I'm Ivan Braginski, back in high school Alfred and I were friends-"

"Acquaintances." Alfred clarified. "What do you want, Ivan? Can't you see I'm in the middle of something?"

The Russian glanced around at the people on the table before rudely guessing "Talking to strangers?"

"Hey, I'm not a stranger!"

"Well actually," Alfred stood up and went around Arthur's chair, circling his arms around the other's neck and resting his chin on top of the sandy blond's head. "This one is far from being a stranger."

After looking from the blushing face of the landlord to Alfred's smirking one, Ivan said "Is that so? Since when did you learn to love?"

"Since I met Arthur." Alfred answered smoothly, his smile thanking the platinum blond for setting him up for that response.

Not wanting the other to win, he casually replied "I'm so glad to hear that, seeing as though you eat the heart of all of those you went out with as fast as you eat your hamburgers,"

"What-"

"…Let's have a nice talk…over there," Alfred tilted his head toward another table.

The Russian smiled his creepy smile before distancing himself from the group, waiting for the other.

"Alfred, wh-" Arthur was about to object to the idea when a kiss to the side of his mouth made him stop mid-word.

The younger blond groaned a bit and whispered into his ear "This will only take a moment, I promise." He then unwound his arms around Arthur and turned on his heel.

The two men disappeared and left the other three in a rather odd silence.

"How rude! That bloke can't just take someone off the table like that!" Arthur started to vent. "Who does he think he is?"

"Uh…there's no need to get too worked up over Ivan, Mr. Kirkland." Matthew offered. "He was Alfred's rival since high school and so…the two will do whatever they can to aggravate the other,"

_Poor Alfred…he's really being driven up the wall…_

While Arthur began interrogating Matthew on this Ivan person, Francis smirked in the direction where the pair was last seen. He caught the guilty expression the American donned after his rival's statement. "How interesting…"

"That was a low blow dude,"

"I was only stating the truth. You and I both know you won the 'Tramp' title of our rivalry,"

Alfred snorted at this. "Please, there was no competition in that area…seeing as though your 'Become one with me' pick-up line got you nowhere." He nibbled on his fries the Russian ordered for him. "…Still, that was one thing I never wanted to best you in…"

"Likewise."

The rivals were seated in another section of the restaurant, far away from the table Alfred was sitting on.

And even though he hated to admit it, Alfred was a tad grateful that his acquaintance invited him over.

After a bit of silence, Ivan offered "Would you like a drink?" Automatically pulling out a flask of vodka from his black vest.

"No…thanks…" He needed all his wit if he was going to make it out of this restaurant unscathed.

The Russian simply shrugged – more for him. But when neither rivals talked, Ivan just drinking straight vodka in the afternoon, someone had to break the ice. "So…I heard you were graduating this year,"

Alfred perked up at the comment. "Yeah, and I won't be inviting you to the commencement."

For less than a second Ivan frowned, covering it up with a smile when he said "You're so cruel,"

The twitch at the edge of his rival's lips didn't escape Alfred's eyes, however, and he caught the hurt look he had for that short instance. He has become increasingly perceptive since "dating" Arthur. "It's not because I hate you," Alfred provided. "I just don't want you to waste your time and money coming over for a ceremony."

"Aw, I knew you cared about me~"

"Don't push your luck…" Alfred quipped, but allowed a teasing smile to creep onto his face. "So…how's your sister?"

"Which one?"

"Both of them actually,"

"They're doing well as usual,"

"Oh come on man!" Alfred raised his arms up in exasperation. "You were the one who dragged me here and wanted to catch up on things…at least try to make it entertaining,"

"But I mean it; neither of them has changed since you last saw them in high school." Ivan insisted, taking another swig from his flask.

It then struck Alfred. "So does that mean…"

Judging by the inquisitive expression of the other, Ivan frowned. "Da."

The American couldn't help but cackle a bit, even if it earned odd looks from the people around him. It felt good to act like himself again. "Are you serious? Natalia's still stalking you? Didn't you try to run away from home or something?"

"I did." Ivan answered curtly, not meeting Alfred's eyes. "It didn't work."

"No way, she found you?"

"In a heartbeat."

Alfred continued to laugh at the simple response. "I'm actually enjoying our little talk!"

"At least one of us is,"

Sympathizing with his old time rival, the blond offered "Believe it or not, I know how you feel,"

"Really now?" Ivan raised an eyebrow at this.

The American's broad smile fell a little as he explained "Yeah…I'm in a similar situation at the moment," pointing a thumb back at the table with the three blonds.

Ivan looked toward the direction before smiling. "I had a feeling he was rather possessive. How did you meet him?"

"In a club." Alfred answered a bit too quickly. He really didn't want to say the truth and the awkwardness of explaining it.

"You don't go to those places." The Russian asserted, now peering at the other with keen violet eyes.

"Says who?"

"Says you. Remember when you told me back in high school that you weren't going to go to a 'meat market' to find someone?"

The blond wondered why he even disclosed that information to his rival back then and scowled. "Damn you and your sharp memory."

"I needed it to be on even grounds with you." The platinum blond sent an innocent smile his way.

"…" Alfred refused to look at the man across from him, focusing on his fries instead. It would appear as though the tables have turned and it was his rival who was now enjoying this conversation.

When the moment passed Ivan frowned as he recalled something. "You're not doing this out of pity again are you?"

Pity was indeed part of it, but not all of it. Still, he wanted Ivan off his back as soon as possible and so nodded his head slowly, pretending to be shameful. "Yeah…"

"You should know by now that it'll only end in the other hating you, da?" the Russian chided.

"I know…but I deserve it don't I?"

His rival grew quiet, contemplating. "It's not your fault you don't love them back. You can neither force nor rush these things. And for them to not realize their own faults in the relationship and understand your problem…you're not the only one to blame."

Alfred nodded his head slowly, still dubious but thanking the other for his explanation. "I guess…say, I was wondering, how do you deal with the stalking and uh…obsession?" Seeing as though they were now stuck in the same predicament, with Ivan having dealt with it longer than him, the blond might as well ask for advice.

"I'm not quite sure if this can apply to you, but I love my sister…just not to the extent to which she loves me," Ivan started, tapping his index finger on his chin. "Maybe teaching your…'boyfriend' to ease off would help; let him know that you still care for him just as much without the breaching of privacy." There was a lot Alfred was hiding from him, he could tell, but the Russian will give him a break…just this once.

"Huh…" Alfred took his rival's words into consideration, finishing up his fries. The advice made sense, but it wasn't going to be easy to actually put into action. "Geez, couldn't you have told me something easier to do?" he teased.

"Nyet." Ivan smiled with his eyes closed. "I'm afraid that's all you're getting out of me, comrade."

Smiling broadly, Alfred got up from his seat as he offered his hand to his high school rival. "I think I should be heading back now, but thanks for inviting me over, Ivan. It really was nice seeing you again,"

Taken by surprise by the other's gesture, Ivan got up as well and accepted the hand, giving him a genuine smile. "Likewise, Alfred. And I wish you luck with your problem."

"Right back at ya, buddy!" Alfred winked before heading towards his previous table.

The platinum blond stared at the American's retreating back for a moment more before taking his leave as well.

"Ah, I see our beloved Alfred has returned," Francis was the first to greet the American, his seat allowing him to have a good view of the restaurant as a whole.

"I'm sorry for my brief absence," Alfred first bowed his head in apology towards Arthur, and then focused on his brother.

If the younger's slumped shoulders and drooping head was anything to go by, he could tell that the two landlords badgered him with questions…most likely about him and Ivan.

"We were just talking about you, mon cher. Mathieu told us that you and Ivan competed in everything,"

With caution, Alfred replied "Yes…back in high school the two of us would strive to best the other in academics, athle-"

"So who was the best lover?" Francis interrupted, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

"We never competed for such a thing." He asserted, irritated that it was now his turn to answer so many questions about himself. However, he noticed how effortlessly the Frenchman eased into the subject he wanted to steer clear of the most.

"While we're on the topic, care to tell us more about your love life before meeting Arthur?" The blond had a very inquisitive look in his eyes…as if he was interrogating the American.

"…I…do not wish to talk about it in public…" Alfred bit his lower lip, looking down to his black dress shoes.

"Then we'll simply-"

"If Alfred doesn't want to talk about it, he doesn't have to." Arthur cut in, glaring the man down to silence. He saw the distraught look in Alfred's eyes when the question was raised and understood that it must have been an unpleasant experience for him. Although the landlord was interested in it as well, he'll just have to wait until Alfred was alone with him to ask again. He then saw that the taller blond was smiling at him sweetly, clearly grateful for the save. It took all of his effort not to hug the man right then and there.

"Francis, would it be alright if I answer your other questions after I finish my lunch?" Alfred asked politely, sending him a small grin.

"Why certainly." The Frenchman said smoothly, trying not to let his agitation show. He knew there was more to Alfred than meets the eye, but the snake was hiding behind Arthur and dodging his questions. While he observed the man trying to enjoy his cold steak and the landlord who was trying not to get caught staring at the American, an idea came to mind. He needed someone to entertain him…

Sighing dreamily as Alfred continued to cut the steak into small pieces, Arthur suddenly felt something hike up his leg. But because he didn't want to draw attention to himself again and scoot out of his chair to look at his feet, he decided to peer into the faces of the people on the table to get a hint.

The other landlord was busy sipping his wine and Matthew looked dead from the neck up at the moment…probably still tired from the tirade of questions thrown at him earlier. This only left him with Alfred…

Alfred smiled charmingly at the man when he felt someone gazing at him. It was what he was supposed to do, right?

"Not in public, love," Arthur whispered as he leaned against Alfred's shoulder, trying to hide the blush spreading across his cheeks.

The American stared at the landlord strangely.

_But I'm not doing anything – Francis!_

"You said only to keep my hands to myself," the Frenchman pointed out when Alfred leered at him.

_What a card…_

"Right…" Alfred gave the blond a kind smile before kicking his leg away. He smirked as he felt his foot hit something.

Matthew suddenly bit his bottom lip roughly and doubled-over onto the table, nearly face-planting into his parfait. When he rose back up, he was glaring at his older brother.

_What are you staring at-!_

Alfred coughed into his fist to conceal a pained cry when Matthew kicked him hard under the table.

"Excuse me." Both brothers said at the same time as they stood up.

"Is something wrong, Alfred?" Arthur looked up when he noticed that the shoulder he was leaning on was gone.

"If you will allow it, may I check the parking meter for the car? I fear we may be running out of time," Alfred asked with pleading eyes.

He only needed an understanding nod from the landlord before taking off.

"Sorry, but my boss just called me; I'm afraid I have to take this," Matthew pulled out his cell phone and excused himself from the table.

The door of the restaurant behind them barely closed when Alfred opened his mouth to say something, only for his brother to beat him to it.

"Why did you kick me you nimrod?"

All forms of mannerism dissipated as Alfred shot back "Why'd ya put your leg there, son? I was aiming for Francis, but consider it payback for what you did to me earlier-OW!"

Matthew made sure to leave no room for argument by smacking the other upside the head. "I was only trying to help you!" His agitated expression dropped when he heard a low voice.

"…Oh…you're gonna get it now…" That hit was the straw that broke Alfred's back. Cracking his knuckles, he looked at his younger brother with a crooked smile on his face.

"W-Wait…Al…I'm sorry, ok?"

"I'm sure you'll be when I'm through with you,"

Feeling as though his life was in danger, the photographer flitted towards his car and pulled out the spare hockey stick he kept in the trunk in case of emergencies of any sort.

"Hey! That's not fair! No weapons allowed!" Alfred scanned the area before snatching an innocent rake resting against a frail tree on the sidewalk.

A passerby across the street from the restaurant, sensing the beginning of a fight, yelled out "MORTAL KOMBAT!"

"You're so noisy, brother," the other blond said stoically and walked ahead.

The boisterous man's cry soon drew a crowd around the brothers…not that they were paying any attention.

Matthew was already charging toward the older, swinging the hockey stick at his legs.

It would have crippled him, but Alfred made a clean jump over it and brought the rake down on the photographer. "Oh yeah! Here comes the pain!"

Back inside the restaurant, where the commotion of the street brawl did not reach their ears, Francis looked at the other landlord up and down while Arthur stared at Alfred's empty seat.

"We're finally alone again~" the Frenchman started.

"You're giving me a hernia." Arthur said flatly, glaring at the chair to his left as if doing so will bring the American back sooner. It doesn't take that long to put money into a parking meter, does it?

Francis brushed off the insult and offered "How is your relationship with Alfred going?"

"Perfectly." The gentleman answered quickly, smirking in the knowledge that Francis knew they were together.

"There's no such thing," Francis objected. "Surely you can name a few of his flaws,"

Arthur hesitated for a moment and really thought it over, but couldn't. Alfred was the perfect gentleman – kind, intelligent, and above all, courteous. They never argued and the conversations they had were always pleasant. "Where are you going with-"

"Then it's too good to be true. You're dating a cold hearted snake."

"You owe me a new hockey stick!" Matthew had somehow managed to tackle his brother down onto the pavement, straddling his hips and strangling him from above.

The hockey stick laid broken in half while the rake was abandoned, two of its teeth missing.

"Blow it out your ass mort! I owe you nothing! Noootthing-!" Alfred screamed at the top of his lungs despite already losing air in his situation.

Around them was quite the crowd.

"Take off your clothes, daze!"

"Which one will win? Make your bets here, aru!"

"Ve, look fratello, street performers!"

"Just keep moving idiot…before they ask us for money,"

"Brother, why is one man on top of the other?"

"Close your eyes, Lili. You shouldn't have to see such indecency."

"Is that hot guy on guy action I spy in front of a restaurant? How romantic!"

"Excuse me you fools! A sidewalk is meant to be _walked_ on! Stop loitering and please move,"

"Can somebody like, get the security guard over here? This is totally getting out of hand,"

"The bastard is sleeping on the job!"

Unable to get the other man off him, Alfred hooked a fist at his brother's only weak spot: his gonads.

Seeing the older's intention, Matthew only had enough time to knee him in the groin before the pain kicked in and he fell over to the side.

After the exchange, both were rolling around and wailing in agony.

"Fatality!"

"Do you know what he's like when he's not in public? Have you ever been to his apartment before?" Francis pressed.

"He just moved in with his brother…so how am I supposed to know?" Arthur defended. "He just needs more time…"

Already reading between the lines, the Frenchman claimed "So, he doesn't intend to stay here for long then…and will leave once his job is done." He eyed the man across from him. "I wonder what he wants from you…"

"Alfred has made no attempt at such a thing!" Arthur already knew what the other was implying, and was plain outraged at the other landlord for making such false accusations. In fact, during their time in the restaurant Alfred has been more affectionate than ever before. He would be lying to himself if he said that he didn't want more physical intimacy between them, but assumed that the American was just being careful and taking it slow…The simple thought made him fall for his Alfred a bit more (if that was even possible). "He's not lewd like you."

"Ah, then he's going after something else…perhaps money?" the blond assessed.

Before more could be said, the dragging of feet across the carpet could be heard as the brothers came back. They had to stop their fight because of a very pissed German who was also eating at the restaurant and had a nice view of the duo near the window.

While Matthew attempted to make it look like it was natural to have blood running down the back of his head, Alfred plopped himself down on his seat again, Arthur almost automatically readjusting his tie that was crooked again somehow. "Arthur, is there a problem?" Despite being weary himself, he continued his service after noticing the sandy blond's somber expression.

"You." Francis answered simply as Arthur opened his mouth.

"I…don't quite understand…" The American earnestly looked into Arthur's eyes, his voice filled with concern. "Is…is there something wrong with me? Did I do something to hurt you, Arthur?"

Before the Englishman could say anything, Francis cut in "There's no point in trying to lie about it, so be honest: Are you playing with his heart for something material? Or is this more of a sport to you?"

Matthew bit his lip, wishing that his friend wasn't so perceptive at this.

_This was a mistake…_

Alfred looked like he was going to cry, his eyes full of hurt.

_Damn this bastard…he figured me out!_

"I would never!" he stood up suddenly, almost knocking over the glass of wine near Francis. "Is it not right to treat the person you love tenderly? Am I doing something wrong?" he questioned the Frenchman pleadingly. In a panic he turned to Arthur. "Arthur, I didn't mean to do anything to offend you…but if I did, please just tell me, and I'll apologize for it…"

"The best thing you can do for him is stay out of his life,"

Defeated, Alfred sank back down on his seat, trying to hold back his sobs. "If that is what will truly make Arthur happy…then I'll reluctantly let him go…"

"Huh? Are you going to give up on your prey that easily?"

"That's enough!" Arthur finally couldn't take it anymore and slammed a palm down onto the table, glaring at the Frenchman. "What right do you have to start patronizing Alfred you frog!"

"Mon cher, can't you see? He's playing you for a fool!" Francis tried to defend himself, pointing an accusing finger at Alfred.

Quickly taking Alfred by the hand, the two left the restaurant in a hurry.

But just before he turned around, Alfred smirked at Francis.

_Looks like I win_

The former landlord saw it and huffed, taking a sip from his wine. "Well played…snake…"

"You…you did all that you could, Francis," Matthew said timidly. "But do you really think Alfred is that bad of a person?" he asked innocently.

"I'm positive." The blond said resolutely. "You should confront your brother about this, seeing as though he's been doing this behind your back,"

Matthew grimaced inwardly at the words, seeing as though it was his fault Alfred was doing this in the first place. "If you couldn't do it, then there's no way I can," he argued humbly. "Perhaps Arthur will have to learn the hard way?"

Francis looked at him questioningly for a moment, not quite knowing how to take the suggestion before finishing his glass. He'll just have to leave it at that.

"Anyway, would you like to accompany me on one of the sites I have to photograph?" the younger blond offered in order to change topics.

X.X.X.X

In Arthur's car, an overbearing silence dawned between the two blonds. For Alfred, it was a time of rest, to finally get away from the source of his troubles. But the fact that Arthur was staring hard at the road, hands clenched around the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles were white, unsettled him.

"Arthur…"

"I don't believe a single word that frog said," he immediately responded. "It's obvious he's just trying to tear us apart…that bastard!"

Alfred winced as the Englishman sharply turned right into his parking stall, setting the parking brake and pulling the key out of the ignition.

_What did he tell Arthur?_ He wondered, wanting to find countermeasures to erase the doubt in Arthur's mind if they appeared again.

"I…I understand if you have some doubts about me, Arthur…I really do. So if you want me to stay away-"

"I want no such thing." Arthur said adamantly, staring into those nervous blue eyes. He smiled when they flared up with hope.

"R-Really?"

"Of course," He reached a hand out to caress the American's cheek, and to his pleasure, the other leaned into his touch. It only got better as the other lunged forward to hug him, letting out a shaky sigh.

"I'm sorry for my behavior at the restaurant today," Alfred whispered into Arthur's ear. "My outburst back there was inexcusable."

"It wasn't your fault," The landlord pointed out, patting the taller blond's back comfortingly. "It was that frog's."

Alfred continued to embrace the other, making sure he couldn't see the calculating look in his eyes.

_That Francis will be a thorn in my side…but I should be okay as long as I keep Arthur away from him…in which case, I'll have to keep a better eye on him…_

His grip on the slighter man tightened a bit. It was weird, but being around the landlord was the best experience he had so far during his stay here. Sure, he had to mind his manners far more often than he'd like, but it sure beat being smacked by a hockey stick or molested by a Frenchman any day.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I do not own the song "Don't Stop Believin'" by Journey

**A/N:** Wow...I actually made Francis the good guy in this fic...a perv, but still he meant well?

Several things shaped this chapter...

1) The image of Francis jumping on top the table and singing "Womanizer" by Britney Spears to Alfred in front of Arthur

2) There was a fight outside of a McDonald's I was at. The security guard over there didn't do anything but watch the fight too and I asked my friend to pass the ketchup for my fries. XD

3) You guessed it: MORTAL KOMBAT! -shot-

**Alfred the "Tramp":** Since it was only mildly mentioned in the chapter, I'll explain it here: like Arthur, there were many who were "lovestruck" and chased Alfred down in high school. He didn't actually feel the same way toward them, but because he felt sorry for them, agreed to go out with them anyway. Eventually they found out the truth and came to hate him for "playing with their hearts".

I'm so happy I was able to put in very brief cameos of a few other characters ^^ Can you spot them all?


	12. Epilogue: Coming Home

**A/N:** I'm very sorry for the confusion, but just so that we're on the same page, the previous chapter was just an extra that was supposed to take place sometime before the last chapter. I just couldn't find a proper place for it and fit it in with the rest of the story. It wasn't the epilogue - this is.

**Warnings:** Illegal amounts of failed fluff? And the usual you'd expect from this fic after all this time...

* * *

Alfred liked to think that the crowd before him was cheering him on, even though he knew no one among them.

Everyone had their own business to tend to and so simply couldn't afford the time and money to come over to a college commencement. As expected, seeing as though he didn't send anyone invitations in the first place.

The blond continued to look on at the ceremony in front of him and after taking a few pictures with fellow graduates and professors, made his way back to the dorms. Alone, he'll pack his things while everyone else was off partying.

Aside from the huge yard where the commencement took place, the whole campus was pleasantly calm; the warm wind gently running through green leaves and the black tassel of Alfred's cap. He shouldn't be in such a rush, seeing as though this will be the last time he'll be setting foot on the university in a long time. While taking the longest route he knew to the dorms and admiring the architecture of the buildings he passed by, Alfred began to wonder how his life will be like now.

Or rather…what life has in store for him and a certain landlord.

Alfred's smile grew wider at the thought of seeing the Englishman again; promising the man he would jump onto the first plane to California once the graduation ceremony was done.

They have come a long way.

He still remembered what happened after he told Arthur that he really would give their relationship a shot. During the week before his departure, Alfred stayed half of his time in Matthew's apartment and the other at the landlord's. This arrangement was made so that the two had time to themselves as well as with each other. "It's all about moderation," Alfred remembered telling Arthur, who already wanted the blond to move in with him. He believed that by taking it slow and steady that he really will develop feelings for the landlord rather than have the man force himself on him.

_He is such a sweet guy! _

Alfred chuckled to himself as he remembered a couple of moments he had with the landlord at his apartment. More than once Arthur offered to share his bed with him, but he insisted that he will sleep on the couch instead. The blond didn't want to add to the tension nor create awkward situations for the both of them. The furniture wasn't comfortable at all, and he gave his younger brother props for sleeping on one for so long when their contract was still in effect.

So if the Englishman couldn't get his American to sleep on his bed, it shouldn't surprise Alfred if he joined him instead right?

Alfred nearly threw Arthur off the couch when the first thing he saw upon opening his eyes one morning was the landlord snuggled up on top of him, sleeping very soundly. After two more similar occurrences, Alfred decided that if they were going to sleep together, might as well be on a bed.

The last week of his vacation was also spent on coming out clean with the other.

It was hard to fully explain himself to Arthur…especially his past "love life". As expected, Arthur was initially shocked by what he told him, and then expectantly disgusted. Although the gentleman tried his best to hide it, Alfred easily saw it in his eyes. Then he was green with envy, even though the American said that there wasn't a need to be…seeing as though the relationships were fake to begin with. But what Alfred didn't expect was Arthur's final expression: pity. The landlord felt sorry for Alfred for not having ever actually loved someone before; which made him all the more determined to be the one to help him experience it (particularly toward him). Arthur had no idea that he already succeeded simply by stating his intention.

Of course, Alfred wasn't the only one with secrets.

While spending time with the sandy blond, the other eventually fessed up to some of the things he has been doing without Alfred's knowledge. A lot of it concerned following the American before when they were "dating", a camera, and a spellbook. He also went into detail about his own love life; how Alfred wasn't actually the first one to use him and throw him out the next day. Arthur even admitted that because of this that he can be a bit…clingy. He didn't want to say that last part for fear that Alfred might be scared off. The landlord didn't know it would have the exact opposite effect.

Many times the thought that Arthur was too good for him came up, but when he told the landlord, he'd simply scold him for even thinking such a thing. This made Alfred determined to show the man that he was worthy of this second chance and his love. Of course the guilt still lingered for quite a while, but turned to gratitude and he would suddenly hold onto Arthur sometimes to make sure this all wasn't just a dream.

Arthur, on the other hand, would sometimes lament at the thought of how their relationship even started and how it could have ended horrifically. It must have been complicated, Alfred knew. And when their attempt to start anew took off, Arthur was suspicious of the American for good reason. He understood completely, giving the sandy blond space and time when he needed it.

Or rather, it was the lack of it all that concerned Alfred…

Arthur would badger him with questions about himself everyday, wanting to know everything about the man. As the landlord would find out, his boyfriend wasn't exactly the gentleman he first made him out to be. He knew first hand that his American had a brain…he just didn't like to use it as often as he should (and far too lazy to).

But it wasn't like Arthur's attitude was flawless either.

The man could be so stubborn at times, Alfred swore; especially when it came to keeping the apartment tidy and his culinary skills.

And it was because of this and other eating habits and hobbies that they didn't always agree on something sometimes. But this was what made everything more real: the fact that they didn't have a perfect relationship made them strive to have one; and it was this endeavor that made it all so perfect in Alfred's eyes.

Parting wasn't easy.

Alfred knew that and still recalled how the last couple of days went for them. Despite trying his best to mend everything up, it wasn't enough in his opinion. The night before his departure, he slept with one eye open for some time; a small part of him refusing to disregard the possibility that Arthur will tie him up on his bed, break his legs, and never let him leave. That was quickly debunked however, when he was served breakfast in bed by a landlord who was trying his best to hold back his tears. Alfred mentally kicked himself over and over again for even thinking badly of the man. So to prove to Arthur that he was serious about their relationship, he presented the Englishman with an emerald ring right before getting on his plane.

Trying to find the silver lining along this sullen cloud, Alfred offered that their separation will give Arthur time to really think things through, to really judge Alfred while he was away. And whatever decision he came to, whether it was love or rejection, the American would take either one without complaint. Alfred really liked to think that the distance helped in both mending and maintaining their fragile relationship; since not only did it give Arthur time to reevaluate himself and Alfred, but teach the Englishman to be less obsessive. Strangely to say, not much has changed from the experience. It was funny how life worked sometimes.

The first day when he was away…went badly…

When Alfred finished unpacking and finally went on his webcam Arthur looked like a mess. It was as if he has been just sitting there staring at the screen and hoping something will pop up soon. The scene made Alfred feel so bad that he almost got another plane ticket to head back to the landlord for one more day. But on other days, the sandy blond would appear smashed in front of his webcam and Alfred would just calmly close his laptop and study his textbooks instead, waiting for the man to come to the next day.

And so, it has been like that for a couple of months while Alfred was away at Harvard: after his classes he would go on his laptop and use his webcam to talk to Arthur. It wasn't that much of a conversation however, because Alfred constantly had to have his nose in a textbook or write a thesis paper when he was on. He earnestly did want to talk to the Englishman more than he did, but Arthur understood and enjoyed just staring at the man studying at his laptop. But when the two did have time to converse he would continuously ask him what he ate, when he slept, and what he did. The American swore, Arthur watched over him like a hawk…no, more like a mother hen. It was all for good reason though, a way to show that he really cared for him, and Alfred respected that.

He didn't know when he fell so hard for the landlord, but with each passing day he looked more and more forward to seeing him on his laptop screen.

But now that the months have gone by and with diploma in hand, Alfred will finally be able to see Arthur in person. Rounding a corner and walking down the empty hallway of the building, he reached his room at the very end of the hallway.

"Congratulations Alfred!"

"Oh my god terrorists got into my room!" The graduate was about to slam the door shut when he heard the voices until he took a second glance at the group. These "terrorists" looked a lot like his friends.

"Well sorry if I look armed and dangerous," Matthew snarked, holding out a stuffed polar bear with a graduation cap on it. "Surprise~"

Alfred was still gaping like a fish despite holding the gift in his arms. The people he knew from his hometown were all there!...Except…He shook his head, knowing that the man was probably waiting for him at his apartment.

"I didn't know you were such an egg-head dude! It's awesome to know someone who's graduating from Harvard! Just not as awesome as me though!" Someone suddenly had an arm swung across the graduate's shoulders, pulling him into a noogie.

It took a while for the American to snap out of it and realize who was assaulting him. But when he did he just couldn't believe it. "No way! You're that dude I almost ran over a while ago!"

The albino snorted at this. "I have a name ya know! It's Gilbert Weillschmidt."

When he was finally let go, Alfred smiled broadly at him and said "It's nice of you to come to my graduation…but how in the hell did you even know about it?"

"…I met him one day at a site I had to take pictures of," Matthew offered in a small voice. "He kept being a troll and jumping in front of my camera whenever I was going to take a shot of the scenery."

"Pfft. No picture is complete without me in it!"

"I don't call shots of a blur a picture,"

As the two argued, Alfred went up to each and every one in the room to give them a bone-crushing hug. Even to Ivan, who smiled knowingly at him.

"It was very rude of you not to send invitations to any of us, da?"

"It's just like you to foil my plans you know that?" Alfred couldn't help but grin at the Russian gratefully. It must have been his rival who told everyone else about the graduation and snuck them all into his dorm. He then turned to his other friends, who weren't looking straight at him but were smirking nonetheless.

It was very evident that they were at the ceremony: Kiku holding a video camera in one hand and Toris an air horn can.

"Honestly Alfred, you should have told me sooner so that I could have given you a proper graduation gift," Kiku chided, offering him something small and wrapped in bright blue paper.

Alfred didn't need X-ray vision to guess that it was the new video game Kiku's company has been working on…a game the blond has been dying to get his hands on. He glomped the man before the others came up to him to give him their gifts as well.

From Toris gift cards to every place Alfred loved, each of them over one hundred dollars in value. To Alfred's chagrin, Ivan gave him a box of extra small condoms…but he made up for it with a fine bottle of vodka. Francis wasn't with them, remaining in Paris; but he must have heard from Matthew about the graduation and sent the blond a gift card for toys…adult toys…

"We should go somewhere to celebrate," Toris spoke up after the rush.

"How about that bar we passed by to get here?" Gilbert immediately suggested, already getting ready to go.

"Sure, whatever you guys want," Alfred gave them the okay when all eyes turned to him. "I'll meet up with you guys over there, since I still gotta change and organize all this," he addressed the bundle of gifts in his arms.

"Are you sure you don't need a ride, Al? You do know which bar we're talking about right?"

"Psh! I've been around here longer than you Matt, of course I know where it is," the graduate said playfully. "Now y'all get outta my room! Before the dorm monitor catches you,"

Once the group left, Alfred started taking off his graduation outfit. The zipper of the black gown was only pulled half-way down when he felt arms around his torso and the body heat of another person behind him.

"Hey there, you made it just in time! We were about to…" he stopped when the person behind him did nothing but nuzzle into his back. "Dude…are you alright?"

Again the figure just nodded, not saying a word.

Alfred couldn't quite figure out who the person was until he tried to turn around, his eyes catching the sight of sandy blond hair. "Arthur!"

The landlord's hold on him tightened when his name was said, burying his face deeper into the material of Alfred's graduation gown.

"Oh my god Arthur you came too!" The American struggled to turn around to embrace the other man as well, but found that he couldn't escape his death-grip. He had to think of something fast before he was broken in half. "O-Okay Artie, calm down…I'm not going anywhere,"

This only earned the graduate an even stronger squeeze around his mid-section and sniffle, but the Englishman eventually let go and allowed Alfred to turn around.

Right after his release, it was Alfred's turn to hug the landlord to death; picking him up from the waist and spinning him round and round while showering the man with kisses on the lips and cheeks. "You actually came!"

"I wouldn't miss it for the world, love," Arthur replied, returning Alfred's enthusiastic kisses with his own. Even after he was put down, he kept his arms around the other's neck.

"I can't believe you made it!" The graduate still couldn't quite grasp the fact that the landlord was right in front of him in his dorm. Indeed, nothing was better than the real thing standing in front of you. "Now that you're here, we can go to the bar and I can introduce you to everyone!" He resumed taking off his gown, shrugging it off his shoulders to reveal a white dress shirt and black tie and slacks underneath. He was about to take off his cap as well when a soft voice made him pause.

"W-Wait, Alfred," Arthur moved in closer to the blond again, reaching toward the black cap. "Allow me,"

The taller blond did nothing but smile widely at the landlord, bowing his head to make the job easier.

Once the cap was off, Arthur gave his lover a sweet kiss before pulling back, slightly abashed by what he just did. But what he was about to do next was going to be even more embarrassing. With Alfred watching him bemusedly, he reached into the front pocket of his beige slacks, producing a small box. He then opened it to reveal a sapphire ring. "Congratulations, Alfred." He really hoped he didn't stammer.

The look on Alfred's face was priceless, and it made Arthur very proud that he was the only one to see such an expression.

"…Arthur…Thank you! You didn't have to get me anything," The blond said while extending his right hand, waiting for the other to put the ring on his finger.

"Of course I had to!" Arthur (now red in the face) quickly retorted, sliding the ring onto Alfred's ring finger. "Y-You wanker! You gave me a ring right before you left so…I wasn't able to…" he couldn't finish his rant, finding shelter in Alfred's awaiting arms.

"Yes, yes," Alfred said soothingly, caressing the back of Arthur's head with one hand while the other was firmly around his waist. "Thank you, Arthur." He sighed into the other's ear and kissed it. "I love you,"

When he distanced himself from Arthur, Alfred saw that the landlord looked like he was going to burst into tears all over again. So he pecked him on the cheek and changed the subject. "Let's get going now, the graduation party doesn't start unless the graduate is there ya know!"

X.X.X.X

At the bar, Alfred's friends were already striking conversations with one another, the alcohol helping a bit to ease any awkwardness or tension. Alfred remained vigilant of how much Arthur was consuming and stopped him when he was labeled tipsy.

At first Arthur argued that he was fine, but a reminder of what happened so many times before had him. So instead he decided to get to know Alfred's acquaintances better, greeting them.

"You wanna know something?" Matthew came over to his older brother, who was watching the landlord converse with Kiku.

"Sure, what is it?"

The younger also stared in the same direction as Alfred. "I moved to a bigger apartment."

"Oh yeah? I'm proud of you, bro!" Alfred genuinely sounded happy for his brother.

"Thanks, it's spacious enough for me to set up my own darkroom to develop some of my photos-"

"That's really old school,"

"It's just a hobby," Matthew shrugged at the older's light-hearted comment. "Anyway, when I told Arthur that I was leaving, he looked a bit distraught…I think he feared that he lost his 'bargaining chip',"

Alfred had to chuckle at that. Did Arthur really think he'd go back on his words and was still dating him for Matthew's sake?

"I'm glad it worked out for the both of you so well," the photographer's words were gentle. "You two have been through a lot."

"I guess I have you to thank for all of it," Alfred turned to his brother, raising his glass up to him. "But do everyone a favor and never open up a match-making business!"

"Well that's certainly no way to talk to someone you owe your love life to!" Matthew teased, but put his glass up as well to cheer.

Before more can be said, the duo saw Arthur coming towards them, stumbling a bit. Matthew took his leave to make sure Gilbert hasn't broken anything yet, leaving the American to tend to the landlord.

He knew he shouldn't be doing this, but he supposed spoiling the sandy blond on such an occasion was appropriate. "Here Arthur, wanna finish my glass for me?"

The Englishman looked up at him quizzically for a moment, but quickly took the drink offered to him and downed it; making sure to find the place where Alfred put his lips on the glass and drink from that spot too.

Alfred was expecting him to call for another one, but was pleasantly surprised when all he did was put the mug down and snuggled against him. "You're so cute, you know that?" he affectionately kissed the man's forehead and held him.

Arthur did nothing but hid his flushed face in Alfred's shoulder until he was sober.

When everyone finally thought that they all had enough, the group left the bar more or less drunk. Everyone left to their respective hotel rooms, packing their things and ready to return home to resume their daily lives. Only Arthur stuck with Alfred and returned to his dorm to help the graduate put everything into boxes. After a while the two decided to take a break – Alfred on his one-seat couch with Arthur in his lap, working on his embroidery that he brought with him.

He watched as those deft fingers set to work on a new design and noticed the piece of jewelry around Arthur's ring finger. Upon retrospect, he'd seen that emerald ring several times before: when the landlord was having a cup of tea, when he was reading the newspaper, when he was doing his embroidery like he was now, and when he was resting his chin in his hand as he stared longingly into the webcam.

The man had never taken the ring off since it was given to him.

The American smiled warmly and was just about to rest his eyes when an accented voice got his attention.

"So Alfred…where are you going to go after this? What do you intend to do?"

_That's such a silly thing to ask!_ Alfred thought to himself. There was no need for Arthur to get nervous and worried over what he'll do. He has already told him that he got a job offering from NASA as an aerospace engineer and luckily, he will work in the same town as Arthur.

Before replying, Alfred gently kissed his cheek and placed a hand over the other's - sapphire and emerald shining brightly side-by-side. "Your heart is my home, Artie; I'll go wherever you go. And I intend to stay by your side…if you don't mind that is,"

Arthur immediately stopped in his work at the words and buried his head in the American's chest, no longer able to suppress the tears of joy. His Alfred was coming home with him! "Don't say such corny things, git!"

Alfred chuckled and nuzzled into his hair, kissing the scalp adoringly. "I'll take that as a 'yes'," Giving the landlord a bit more time, he then asked "Should we continue packing?"

Not wanting to get off the other's lap, Arthur picked up his embroidery and insisted "Just let me finish this first, I'm almost done,"

Although the project was only half done at best, Alfred smiled softly and agreed to remain where he was, once again wrapping his arms around the Englishman and resting his head on his shoulder.

Arthur on the other hand, leaned back as close to Alfred's body as possible.

The two remained like this until the landlord felt more of the blond's weight on him and when he turned around, the American's sleeping face greeted him. Arthur smiled at the sight. He could sympathize on how long of a day it has been for his graduate. Reluctant to stand up, he grabbed the blanket that hasn't been put away yet off the bed and returned to Alfred's lap, turning his body to the side so that he could rest his head comfortably on his chest.

On their own accord, Alfred's arms encircled the Englishman once more, the blond smiling in his sleep.

Wrapping the sheet around himself and his precious, he too fell asleep to the lullaby of Alfred's beating heart.

Neither the embroidery nor packing was done, but they always had tomorrow to work on it.

And, each other.

* * *

**Endnotes:** ...TAADAAAAAA -shot-

See? Told ya I'm not good with happy endings...OTL But I tried, right?...Right?

Happy and sappy was what I was going for, and so realism/everything else got chucked out the window :D And for that I'm sorry...Kinda...

Yes...I basically glossed over all that complicated relationship stuff and jumped right into the happy couple phase TROLOLO Because honestly, I'm not good at writing fics in which they actually mend it so yeah...and because this is still under the humor category, I might as well make Al fall for Arthur in a comedic way. ^^;

Anyway, this is the end of it all. I really hope I didn't disappoint you beloved readers, but if I did I am so sorry OTZ

But still, thank you so much for sticking around so long! Words really can't express my gratitude at the moment.

It has been so much fun to write this despite the more angsty parts and your comments have made it even so much better! I really would have never dreamed that so many of you would even be interested in this monstrosity of a plot that snowballed from a real life situation. le sigh, I really am sad to say that this is it. There were a lot of ways this story could have went, but I'm glad how it turned out in the end. ^_^

Once again thank you so, so much for reviewing, reading, faving, alerting and even noticing (Matthew knows the pain XP) this fic and I really hope you enjoyed it! Stay awesome and taleeho~


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